filipa bellette podcast cover

Infidelity doesn’t just affect your heart—it impacts your body, mind, and energy in profound ways. In this episode, betrayal recovery coach and somatic attachment therapist Lora Cheadle sits down with functional medicine expert Filipa Bellette to explore the connection between burnout, betrayal trauma, and body-based healing. Learn why chronic stress, exhaustion, and even autoimmune issues often accompany betrayal—and discover practical, science-backed tools to help you reclaim your health, energy, and emotional stability.

Top 3 Takeaways:
  1. Betrayal Trauma & Burnout Are Linked – Many women mistake betrayal trauma for burnout, but the emotional devastation of infidelity triggers deep physiological responses that deplete your energy, gut health, and mental clarity.
  2. Your Body Holds the Key to Healing – If you feel exhausted, anxious, or stuck in obsessive thought loops, your dopamine levels and nervous system regulation may be the root cause. Learn how nutrition, functional medicine, and somatic healing can restore balance.
  3. You Can’t Heal in a Toxic Environment – Whether staying or leaving, true recovery requires a supportive environment. Learn how to identify hidden stressors, rebuild your nervous system, and protect your health as you navigate infidelity recovery. 

#BetrayalRecovery #Burnout #SomaticHealing #InfidelityHealing #SelfWorth #BodyBasedHealing #LoraCheadle #FunctionalMedicine

 

About Filipa:

Filipa Bellette  is Co-Founder of multi award-winning health practice Chris & Filly Functional Medicine – and author of Ending Body Burnout. She is an accredited Clinical Nutritionist, Functional Medicine Practitioner, Coach & Trauma Therapist. She is also a PhD Scholar & regularly featured in the media, such as the Today Show, nine.com.au, Forbes and Body+Soul.

 

Together with her husband Chris Bellette, Filipa has worked with over 2,500+ burned-out clients in the past combined 25+ years. Their practice is best known for ending body burnout (for good!) in “busy” people with energy, mood & gut issues, with their ROOT-root-cause approach. They were awarded as the Tasmanian State Winner & National Finalist for the Telstra Best of Business Awards 2022, as well as Winner for the Australian Women’s Small Business Champion Awards 2022.

Filipa’s own passion for helping “busy” people have more energy, productivity and connection, came from her own personal experience of body burnout, after juggling the demands of business, family, and her failing health.

Website – www.chrisandfilly.fm 

FaceBook – https://www.facebook.com/chrisandfilly 

Instagram – @chrisandfilly_fm  

LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/filipa-bellette-73339019/ 

 

About Lora:

Lora Cheadle is a betrayal recovery coach, attorney, and TEDx speaker who helps women heal from betrayal on an energetic, emotional, and ancestral level—while also providing legal guidance to help them navigate the practical complexities of infidelity and relationship transitions. She empowers women to rise from the ashes, reclaim their identity and self-worth, break free from repeating patterns, and step into their power with confidence, clarity, and grace.

After being shattered by her husband’s fifteen years of infidelity, Lora knows firsthand what it takes to transform devastation into an invitation for healing, freedom, and joy. Her unique approach blends deep emotional healing with tangible legal and life strategies, guiding women beyond betrayal into lives of unapologetic confidence and purpose.

As the founder of Life Choreography Coaching & Advocacy, Lora provides comprehensive legal, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual support on demand. She believes that infidelity doesn’t have to be the end of the dream you poured your heart and soul into—it can be the beginning of a life filled with sovereignty, connection, and joy.

Licensed to practice law in California and Colorado, Lora is also a trauma-aware coach, clinical hypnotherapist, somatic attachment therapist, and advanced integrated energy practitioner. She is certified in yoga, mindfulness, group fitness, and personal training, bringing a holistic perspective to healing.

She is the author of FLAUNT! Drop Your Cover and Reveal Your Smart, Sexy, & Spiritual Self (an International Book Awards Finalist and Tattered Cover Bestseller) and It’s Not Burnout, It’s Betrayal: 5 Tools to FUEL UP & Thrive. She also hosts the podcast FLAUNT! Create a Life You Love After Infidelity and Betrayal.

Based in Colorado, Lora is an adventure-seeker who loves travel, a great book, and saying yes to life’s magic.

 

Betrayal Recovery Tool Kit:

Find Relief, Reclaim Yourself, and Rewrite Your Story

Download your Betrayal Recovery Tool Kit at www.BetrayalRecoveryGuide.com and start reclaiming yourself and your life today!

 

 

Let’s connect! Share your thoughts or questions from this episode with Lora at loracheadle.com. New episodes every week.

Subscribe, like, share, and join Lora Cheadle on your journey to reclaim your sparkle and create a life you love.

 

Special Offers from Our Sponsors!

 

Thank you to BetterHelp for sponsoring this podcast! Take charge of your mental health and get 10% off your first month of therapy at https://BetterHelp.com/FLAUNT

 

 

Are you ready to Rise Up, Reclaim Your Story, & Reign as the Queen of your Life? Infidelity may have shaken your world, but it doesn’t define you. You are powerful. You are worthy. And you are capable of creating a future filled with confidence, clarity, and joy. I will walk by your side, giving you the perspective, permission, and wisdom to transform your betrayal into something profoundly empowering. Whether you work with me one-on-one or complete my Affair Recovery Programs from the privacy of your home, you’ll gain the tools to untangle yourself from the past, reclaim your power, and step boldly into your next chapter. Your healing starts now! Learn more at:

www.AffairRecoveryForWomen.com
Visit www.LoraCheadle.com for more resources & inspiration.

 

 

READY TO START A BETTER CHAPTER? Step into the future you’ve always dreamed of with the power of transformative rituals with the Mindful Subscription Box. Get a monthly box full of crystals, aromatherapy, and other spiritual tools worth $120. You deserve high-quality gems, crystals, oils, and mindfulness tools for self-care that truly work. It’s a monthly dose of self-love delivered right to your door!  Go to www.Mindfulsouls.com  and use Discount Code LORA30 for 30% off your order!

 

 

FLAUNT!: Drop Your Cover and Reveal Your Smart, Sexy & Spiritual Self, author Lora Cheadle

 

  • International Book Award, Finalist Motivational Self-Help 2021
    • Tattered Cover Bestseller 2019

Are you tired of living a life dictated by others? What if you could break free and be who you are? If you’ve felt trapped by expectations and long to be free, FLAUNT! is the key to unlocking who you are, expressing yourself authentically, and choreographing your life your way.

Unleash the power within and embrace your true self with this transformative guide that empowers you to strip away societal expectations and discover your authentic, smart, sexy, and spiritual self. Through a unique blend of humor, wisdom, and actionable steps, you can uncover your deepest desires and build the confidence to live a life full of passion and purpose.

Buy Now on Amazon, or wherever books are sold.

.

 

It’s Not Burnout, It’s Betrayal: 5 Tools to FUEL UP & Thrive, is the essential guide for burnout and betrayal relief. Packed with insight and practical tools, this book is a must-have for individuals, teams, and leaders alike. Available on Amazon. Learn more at www.itsnotburnoutitsbetrayal.com

#HealingAfterBetrayal #InfidelitySupport #BetrayalTraumaRecovery #SelfWorthAfterBetrayal #EmpoweredHealing #RiseAndReclaim #HeartbreakToHealing #RebuildingTrust #MindBodyHealing
#EnergyHealingForBetrayal #SelfLoveJourney #BreakFreeFromBetrayal #YouAreNotAlone MindsetShift #VisionFor2025 #FreeWorkshop #VisionBoard2025 #LoraCheadle #NewBookRelease
#PreOrderNow

 

Transcript

Lora Cheadle [00:00:01]:
You’re listening to Flaunt, find your sparkle and create a life you love after infidelity or betrayal. A podcast for women who’ve been betrayed by their intimate partner and want to turn their devastation into an invitation to reclaim them selves and their worth. Tune in weekly so you can start making sense of it all and learn how to be okay on the inside no matter what goes on on the outside. Download your free betrayal recovery toolkit at betrayalrecoveryguide.com.

Lora Cheadle [00:00:35]:
This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp. Have you been struggling lately? Relationship issues impact every area of your life. When I found out about my husband’s infidelity, I was so devastated. I could barely function. Sleeping was impossible because I couldn’t shut off my brain. Eating was a challenge because I felt nauseous all the time, and for the 1st month or so, everything felt pointless. Whether you’re having trouble sleeping, feeling hopeless, or just can’t focus, BetterHelp is here to help you. BetterHelp offers licensed therapists who are trained to listen and help.

Lora Cheadle [00:01:12]:
You can talk to your therapist in a private online environment at your convenience. There’s a broad range of expertise in BetterHelp’s 20,000 plus therapist network that gives you access to help that might not be available in your area. Just fill out a questionnaire to help assess your specific needs, and then you’ll be matched with a therapist in under 24 hours. Then you can schedule secure video and phone sessions. Plus, you can exchange unlimited messages, and everything you share is completely confidential. I know that confidentiality was important for me, especially early on when I couldn’t even get my own mind wrapped around what was happening, and it was so comforting to be able to speak with someone candidly about everything I was going through to validate that what I was feeling and experiencing was completely normal. You can request a new therapist at no additional charge anytime. Join the 2,000,000 plus people who have taken charge of their mental health with an experienced BetterHelp therapist.

Lora Cheadle [00:02:15]:
Special offer to flaunt, create a life you love after infidelity and betrayal listeners. You get 10% off your 1st month at betterhelp.com/flaunt. That’s betterhelphelp.com /flaunt, f l a u n t. Thanks again to BetterHelp for sponsoring this podcast. Hello. Hello. I am really looking forward to this show because it is a little bit different for me, and here’s why. In this show, we’re gonna talk a lot about body based burnout and for two reasons.

Lora Cheadle [00:03:07]:
First of all, infidelity takes a huge toll on the body. And as you may or may not know, I am a somatic attachment therapist, And what that means is I help you get in touch with those emotions that are locked, that are stuck in your body, that can be bringing you down, that can be creating aches, that can be creating pains, that can be creating all of those physical blocks and sensations that don’t feel good or that worst case scenario truly can create illnesses in the future. So why I am bringing the show to you, why I have invited this guest on the show is because she is one of those people who understands the body in terms of nutrition, in terms of body based burnout. Now, also, what I want to be clear about, the reason that I’m using the word burnout is you might have seen this too. I recently released my newest book. My newest book is called It’s Not Burnout, It’s Betrayal, 5 Tools to Fuel Up and Thrive, and it’s available on Amazon either as a paperback or as a Kindle, download. So definitely check it out on Amazon. But what I wanted to talk to you a little bit about what that book was born from because you might be thinking burnout betrayal.

Lora Cheadle [00:04:44]:
What is what is going on with this? Okay. I am a former corporate attorney. I practice law for 10 years, and I burned out. I burned out and I walked away. And when I walked away, I that’s when I first started coaching. That’s when I first went into the wellness coaching space and I was coaching around, well-being. That’s when I went back to school and became a hypnotherapist. That’s when I got my coaching certification.

Lora Cheadle [00:05:16]:
That’s when I started doing all of those things because I I was focused on the wellness side of things. And it was interesting because about a year into my new business doing wellness coaching, burnout hit me again. And it hit me a few times. Once I even had adrenal fatigue, and it hit me really hard, really badly. And I couldn’t really figure out why because I was doing all of the things that I was supposed to be doing to combat burnout. I was meditating. I was practicing mindfulness. I was doing breath work.

Lora Cheadle [00:05:53]:
I had all the tools. I was doing my own hypnosis. I was doing, like, all of the things, fitness, yoga, you name it. I was doing it. And it was really interesting because it was the same story for some of my clients. I would teach them these incredible brain body tools, and they would work. And then sometimes they would stop working. And I never could figure that out.

Lora Cheadle [00:06:19]:
Then when I went through my own infidelity experience and I started learning about betrayal trauma and I started studying betrayal trauma, that’s when I went, oh my gosh. What I was experiencing was not burnout. It was a sense of betrayal. I felt betrayed by life. I felt betrayed by circumstance. I felt betrayed by my company. At the time, when I walked away, I had 2 kids. I had just had a newborn, and my kids are 22 months apart.

Lora Cheadle [00:06:58]:
So I had 2 kids barely under 2. And my husband had a job where he was traveling, and he was out of state 2 weeks out of every month. And in the middle of it all, 3 out of 4 of my grandparents were in various stages of dying. We had emphysema. We had cancer. It was just not a good time. And I kept saying things like, this isn’t what I signed up for. I didn’t sign up to be a single mom.

Lora Cheadle [00:07:24]:
This is not what I expected. This is what I thought it was gonna be like, which I now know are symptoms of betrayal. When you feel like you have been betrayed by life, by circumstance, by whatever, it doesn’t matter if there wasn’t an actual betrayal or not. Life did not truly betray me. My company never truly betrayed me. My husband getting a job out of state wasn’t really a betrayal. My grandparents passing away wasn’t a betrayal. It just felt like it was a betrayal because it wasn’t what I expected.

Lora Cheadle [00:08:00]:
It wasn’t what I land on. So it felt like a betrayal, and it manifested in me, in my heart, in my body, in my emotions as if it were a betrayal. And that’s what it really clicked for me that it’s not always just burnout. Sometimes it is. But it’s not always just burnout. It’s betrayal. And until we identify and manage and address that betrayal, we’re always going to feel resentful. We’re always gonna feel like this isn’t fair.

Lora Cheadle [00:08:41]:
Life is so not fair. Everybody else has a good marriage. Everybody else has a faithful spouse. Everybody else has whatever it is. So that’s why I wrote my book. It’s not burnout. It’s betrayal. To really take a deep dive and to break that down and to show people the difference between burnout and betrayal, and then to give them 5 tools that they could use, whether at home or at work, with kids, with family members, with a spouse, whatever, to start addressing that betrayal.

Lora Cheadle [00:09:18]:
And it is not infidelity specific. The infidelity specific stuff, I talk a lot about here, and it’s very similar. But this book is not infidelity specific, but it’s very useful for infidelity. So that’s why I’m bringing this conversation to you this week with this guest. I want to, first of all, let you know that this new book is out there. It’s gonna be really helpful for you to understand betrayal in a broader context. The 5 tools are encapsulated in the acronym FEWEL UP, and these are tools that you will be able to use to address infidelity, but also to address the ways you felt betrayed in your marriage, the way you might feel betrayed by getting a divorce. You might feel like this isn’t what I expected.

Lora Cheadle [00:10:17]:
This is not the way I thought my life was gonna turn out. That’s a sense of betrayal. You might feel betrayed because custody, because kids are choosing to live with your partner, because family members are siding with your partner, and you’re thinking, are you freaking kidding me? So this book will help you address betrayal in all forms. But part of the understanding betrayal is also understanding burnout. Burnout is described, not really described, defined. Burnout is defined as stress that has been unsuccessfully managed. Does that happen during betrayal? Sure does. Does that happen during divorce? Sure does.

Lora Cheadle [00:11:00]:
Does that happen to you? Sure does. You are probably burned out, and you have been betrayed. Betrayal is defined as the breaking of an expectation that you have relied on. That ruptures your view of yourself or the world. So that’s why I’m bringing you this show. You know, you’ve been betrayed. This episode, my book is going to shed light on all the ways you’ve been betrayed, and it’s going to help you identify, oh, I’m also burned out because dealing with this is exhausting. So check out my new book.

Lora Cheadle [00:11:44]:
It’s not burnout. It’s betrayal, 5 tools to fuel up and thrive on Amazon. And then enjoy this conversation with my guest around body based burnout so you can start feeling better, so you can start processing emotions, so you can start reclaiming your health and building up strength and vitality. So with that, welcome to the episode. Hello, and welcome to FLAWNT, create a life you love after infidelity or betrayal. I’m Lora Cheadle, and I am so excited for today’s podcast. We have got an incredible guest who is a functional medicine doctor, and she and I have so many of the same beliefs and philosophies around burnout and how it impacts our bodies. And in case you’re saying burnout, what do you mean? I I’ve been betrayed.

Lora Cheadle [00:12:50]:
What, what do you mean by that? Here’s what I’m going to say. When you go through infidelity, it’s exhausting. Ask me. I know. It’s not like you can say, oh, I’m just gonna deal with this on Monday, get back to work on Tuesday, have some deep conversations one day Thursday and be fine on Friday. This impacts you physically, emotionally, spiritually. I believe even ancestrally. And if you don’t take care of it, it just keeps coming back because ultimately the energy that you’re putting out is kind of the energy of self betrayal.

Lora Cheadle [00:13:29]:
And no, this is not about self blame. This is not saying you caused it. It’s about being aware of you, your energy, taking control, and co creating your life. So with that, welcome to the show, Philippa Bellett. I am so excited to talk.

Filipa Bellette [00:13:50]:
Yay. Thank you so much. I’m I’m really excited to talk with you today as well. There’s definitely lots of lovely overlaps.

Lora Cheadle [00:13:58]:
Absolutely. Well, let’s start with a little bit about your background, who you are, and what you do.

Filipa Bellette [00:14:04]:
Yeah. Awesome. So as you said before, I am a functional medicine practitioner. I’m also a clinical nutritionist, transformational coach, and trauma therapist. And I am based in Australia. Might have recognized my accent. So we have a functional medicine practice here that specializes in ending body burnout in busy people with energy, mood, and gut issues.

Lora Cheadle [00:14:29]:
Yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely. And when you talk about burnout, can we start by defining burnout? Because I know there’s many different definitions. And my upcoming book is called it’s not burnout, it’s Betrayal. And I have a very specific definition about burnout too. So let’s start with your definition of burnout.

Filipa Bellette [00:14:48]:
Yeah. Awesome. So, I mean, most I’m pretty sure all of your listeners by now would have heard the term burnout. And, traditionally, it was a term that came about in the workplace. So you’re working too hard. You’re, not resting, recovering enough, and now you’re feeling burnt out. We coined the term body burnout because in our functional medicine practice, we look at what actually happens at a physiological level when you have been running patterns of busyness, overdoing, perfectionism, people pleasing for decades. And often, these patterns start early on in life as well.

Filipa Bellette [00:15:27]:
Like, it’s not just when you start working. It can be being stuck in a fight in a state of fight or flight for a long time. Definitely, if you’ve had relationship, conflict, issues, betrayal, that is a huge stressor as well that keeps your system stuck in fight flight or it can keep it. Obviously, there’s tools and techniques we can do and processes to get out of that. But body burnout is really is really where, like, standard burnout, you know, you might go on a holiday and feel okay. Body burnout is when you go on a holiday or you get a really good night’s sleep and you still feel crap. Like, you’re chronically fatigued, anxious, irritable. Often, there’s other body symptoms happening as well.

Filipa Bellette [00:16:12]:
So when you’ve been stuck in fight flight for a long time, your gut can stop digesting properly. So a lot of people start developing gut issues, autoimmune type issues, skin issues, hormone issues. It’s all connected. And yeah. So that’s that’s our definition of body burnout.

Lora Cheadle [00:16:29]:
Yeah. Thank you for that. Because I know for myself, and I know from so many of the women that I coach too, you get so rundown. You get so exhausted because it’s not like you’re running at a 100% and you’re getting great sleep and everything is fantastic. And then you find out that your partner’s cheated and you just have this, you know, wellspring of health and vitality and vibrancy that can get you through it. Mhmm. For most of the women, they have been exhausted. They have been run down.

Lora Cheadle [00:17:01]:
They’re taking care of kids. They’re trying to work. There have been relationship issues along the way and it wears you out. So then you get this big hit and you can’t eat and you can’t sleep. And you’re right. The gut issues are horrible. Autoimmune is horrible. I went through adrenal fatigue.

Lora Cheadle [00:17:21]:
I literally couldn’t get up.

Filipa Bellette [00:17:24]:
Yeah. Yep. Yep. It’s huge.

Lora Cheadle [00:17:26]:
Yeah.

Filipa Bellette [00:17:26]:
And and I think what you said there was really crucial as well is that often it’s not it’s not the big event that happens that then causes the burnout. It’s sort of, like, happening all along anyway, but then a big event like betrayal, for example, comes along, and it’s almost like the last straw on the camel’s back. And these imbalances that were already sort of simmering beneath the surface, now there’s this big stressor, and it can show up physically in the body.

Lora Cheadle [00:17:52]:
Yes. Yes. And and you’re right. It is. It’s simmering beneath the surface. And then in addition to that, so often we can rally. Okay. There’s been this big event.

Lora Cheadle [00:18:02]:
We can do it. We can start communicating. We can save our marriage. We can do all of this. And then you’ve given everything else and then you crash. And I can’t tell you how many people come to me and my practice and they’re like, I’ve been at this for a year, and I can’t do it anymore.

Filipa Bellette [00:18:18]:
Yeah. It’s exhausting.

Lora Cheadle [00:18:20]:
It’s very exhausting. So what are I think, first of all, how do you recognize if you’re in body burnout?

Filipa Bellette [00:18:30]:
So there’s there there definitely can be early signs and then later signs. So the early signs I would be thinking about so the three core ones are energy, mood, and gut issues. So earlier signs of those ones. For energy, it might be kinda like you’re not waking up, with the energy that you used to in the morning, or you’re getting that slump in the afternoon, or it’s hitting 7 o’clock at night, and you’re like, gee, I think I need to go to bed. Energy could also show off as brain fog as well. So your mind just isn’t as sharp as what it used to. You might be starting to have some sleep issues. Then we’ve got mood imbalances.

Filipa Bellette [00:19:07]:
So you might not yet be on the side of diagnosed clinical depression anxiety, but there might be earlier signs of irritability, mood swings, not responding to stresses like you used to, especially those smaller ones that used to roll off your back, as if it’s water on a duck’s back, but now you’re getting quite sensitive to them. If any of your listeners have children, that’s often where it shows up to where it’s like the screams or, the wants or the needs. It’s, like, very grating. I called myself the dragon mom because I was definitely back there when my kids were little, and I was not well. And then gut issues. So earlier signs might be, oh, I used to be able to eat all the things, and now I’m starting to get a bit of a sensitive gut when I eat gluten or dairy or sugar. There might be earlier signs of heartburn or bloating or your bowel motions aren’t working very well. Later signs of those, kinda like those same symptoms, but bigger, louder, things that we can’t ignore anymore.

Filipa Bellette [00:20:10]:
So chronic fatigue, excruciating brain fog, where you just can’t work properly. Your brain is not functioning very well. You’re not making decisions or recalling things the way you that you used to. Insomnia can show up. Anxiety, depression. And those gut issues can be louder, but it’s often developing into more systemic things. So it might be autoimmune conditions, hormone imbalances, skin issues, and and, yeah, that that they would be the main signs.

Lora Cheadle [00:20:38]:
Yeah. That makes sense. Okay. So once the listeners can recognize, they’re gonna say, okay. I’m I am in a state of fight or flee fight, flight, or freeze. I am experiencing trauma. I don’t have energy. My mood is all over.

Lora Cheadle [00:20:53]:
Of course, I’m going through this horrible thing. I will just wait. I’ll just wait until it passes and take care of myself then because there’s no point in doing it now, and I’m totally exhausted now. So why should I do it now? So talk about when is the ideal time to start taking steps to feel better?

Filipa Bellette [00:21:15]:
Well, look, that’s going to be individual for the for the person. I would always say, like, now is a great time, but, obviously, that would depend on the space, the headspace that you have, and what else is happening in your life. Mhmm. I might share a personal story because my marriage in the past, like, my husband is now in my business or our business. We have a business together. So life is great now. But definitely in the past, we had, marriage issues and there were trust issues, and that was in the depths of my own body burnout as well. So I had a lot of, like, the symptoms that I just mentioned earlier.

Filipa Bellette [00:21:52]:
And and I was at breaking point, so I called myself in my head the dragon mom, the dragon wife. My husband wasn’t coming home until, like, 10 o’clock at night. He had a business, but eventually, when we had the conversation, he’s like, I just don’t wanna come home because I feel like I have to walk on eggshells. You’re screaming all the time. Mhmm. I felt the same way as well, like, about him that, not that he was screaming at me, but I had a lot of physiological imbalances that were causing major trust issues. Like, I became quite obsessed with checking his email and his text messages.

Lora Cheadle [00:22:31]:
Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:22:31]:
And and I could have waited. Like, I could have waited until things were better, but I was pretty much at breaking point. Yeah. I thought if I don’t change something now, I’m gonna psychologically damage my children, and we’re going to get a divorce. Yep. So so was it the best time? No. Like, I was I was this close to having a breakdown, but it also was the best time because if I didn’t do anything about what was happening in my in my body and in my mind, then I would have lost the most important things that were important to me. So so the first step I took oh, look, my health journey was it spanned over 10 years.

Filipa Bellette [00:23:13]:
Like, initially, I started looking at my nutrition and my lifestyle. But at that breaking point, this is when I discovered functional medicine. And and functional medicine goes beyond just natural like, it isn’t it sits in the natural therapies, but we’re also using evidence based lab testing that goes beyond what regular doctors, medical specialists test for. And that was a really gay that was a big game changer for me at that moment because all I needed to do was provide some bodily specimens to lab test what was going on in my body and then start some protocols. Now that wasn’t it wasn’t addressing the root cause, but it got me out of that that fight flight breaking point and also, like, the energy slump that I was feeling so that I had more capacity to actually deal with what was the root cause of what was going on with my behavioral patterns, my trust issues, and to start repairing my relationship.

Lora Cheadle [00:24:15]:
Yeah. Thank you so much for sharing that, because that is, I think, such a perfect thing to hear that unless we are at a healthy capacity, unless we’re feeling good and thinking clearly, we don’t have capacity to show up and be the best wife, the best mom, the best partner, the best friend

Filipa Bellette [00:24:40]:
Mhmm.

Lora Cheadle [00:24:40]:
Than we can be. And while it might be difficult or challenging to all of a sudden be like, okay. Now I have to focus on nutrition? What do you mean? If you don’t do it, your capacity goes down, and everything might become moot anyway because you’ve just lost it all. So

Filipa Bellette [00:25:00]:
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. I think a big part of what helps me build capacity too, so I also had adrenal fatigue. But my dopamine levels, so my brain chemical and neurotransmitter dopamine was, like, so low. And a sign of that being low is anxiety, depression, energy issues, low motivation, but also obsessive tendencies.

Lora Cheadle [00:25:24]:
Yes.

Filipa Bellette [00:25:26]:
Yeah. So that was like, oh, the when I started supporting my brain, that that, like, that obsessive need to always check-in, not check-in with my husband, but check up on what he was doing, it actually disappeared. It actually, like, over the weeks, just got less and less and less to the point that I picked up his phone one time, and I’m like, why am I doing that? I don’t even need to do that. Yeah. Okay.

Lora Cheadle [00:25:52]:
Yeah. That’s huge. Okay. Let’s let’s just hone in on that one right now because dopamine is huge. How can we increase our levels of dopamine so we can feel better, so we can stop being obsessive?

Filipa Bellette [00:26:09]:
Yeah. So so in our practice, we always take a holistic approach, so there can be many, many ways we can do that. From a from a nutritional or, like, supplement nutritional medicine point of view, Tyrosine is an amino acid that’s really important for your body to be able to produce Diphramine levels. Now I wouldn’t play around with it unless you actually test to see if you need it because, yeah, you don’t wanna play around with the brain, unless you actually need the thing. But tyrosine’s really important. And there’s also a lovely herb called mucuna, which has naturally occurring l dopa. So l dopa is one step before the conversion of dopamine. So you can get, like, some nice supplements to help support and build up those neurotransmitters.

Filipa Bellette [00:26:56]:
Vitamin b’s are really important well, especially vitamin b 6. You can’t convert amino acids into your brain chemicals unless those b’s are intact. Mhmm. And your brain chemicals, so you’re burning through Tyrosine and also your b’s when you’re under stress. Like, there there’s a lot of nutrients that just get burnt up, so you can end up with a lot of nutritional deficiencies, which then lead to different body systems burning out. But also then in order to repair them, we need to build the stores up.

Lora Cheadle [00:27:26]:
Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:27:26]:
Then from a lifestyle point of view, I mean, yeah, you can get a lot of tyrosine bees in so many foods. There’s a lot of amino acid as a protein, so you’d want to get that from a protein sauce. But the biggest thing, I think, is reducing your stress bucket. So these dopamine is can be burnt out. Like, the number one reason why I see it in practice with clients that we test, their body systems for The number one reason why dopamine is low is because of chronic stress and being stuck in the fight flight. So getting to the root of what’s going on there, staying no to things, learning how to regulate your nervous system, clearing unprocessed trauma, unprocessed emotions, changing the beliefs that you have about yourself, like, all of this stuff that’s happening at an unconscious level Mhmm. Is I feel like a huge reason why people’s brains burn out. And then, obviously, you know, if there’s been relationship issues, conflict, betrayal, trust issues, then either, like, getting out of it, resolving it, you can’t heal in a toxic environment.

Filipa Bellette [00:28:37]:
So I know that this is your expertise in terms of, you know, when is it right to to leave the environment.

Lora Cheadle [00:28:43]:
Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:28:44]:
But, again, like, changing your environment so that you can heal so that these neurotransmitters can return back to full function is so important.

Lora Cheadle [00:28:52]:
Yeah. It is. I really appreciate that you said you can’t heal in a toxic environment because that is so true. And I just want to, like, underline that. You can support yourself while you’re figuring this out, but don’t stay there forever. You know? There’s people always ask me, how do I know if I should stay or leave? Well, you don’t necessarily know. How do you know if your partner is gonna change? You don’t necessarily know. They may or they may not.

Lora Cheadle [00:29:19]:
And of course, you’re gonna wanna give it time to figure some things out. Once you start having the realization though that this isn’t going to work, that this is toxic. It is important to leave. And in the meantime, you can support yourself.

Filipa Bellette [00:29:39]:
Mhmm.

Lora Cheadle [00:29:39]:
And I love how you talk about, you know, the nutritional and the lifestyle. And and I especially wanna keep talking about that. When I found out about my husband’s infidelity, I could not eat. I was just sick and nauseous all the time, and I could not eat. Now I know sometimes it can be like, well, just take a good multivitamin. And I’m sure that can help in the short run. But speaking to the women who are in a state of trauma and who are like, I don’t have capacity to make salads and freshly meats. And what what can they do to support their nutrition first?

Filipa Bellette [00:30:21]:
Well, before even talking about food, I would be I would start by thinking about, preparing your body to actually consume food. So if you are in this state where there is big stuff happening and you are stuck in fight flight, your the reason why people lose their appetite is because you you can’t rest and digest when you’re in fight flight. So essentially, like, your digestive organs switch off, and then you’re not sending cues to your body or your mind that you’re hungry. And so your appetite just gets very suppressed. And it’s a safety and protective mechanism because if you try and force food into a body that’s not ready to digest it, then, you know, that’s gonna cause more stress in the body. Food putrefies, pathogens overgrow, you’re not absorbing it. So the body’s like, well, we’ll just switch that off because the tiger’s chasing us, and that’s more important at the moment. Yeah.

Filipa Bellette [00:31:14]:
So so there can be, like, some simple things. Now if someone’s in a state of crisis at the moment, you know, obviously, that needs to be addressed for long term results.

Lora Cheadle [00:31:25]:
Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:31:25]:
But you can start off with breathing, like breathing, especially when you’re exhaling, long out longer than you are inhaling. So say 3 breaths in, 6 breaths out. That has been shown, like, there’s so many studies that show that that helps. That’s the fastest way we can get into our parasympathetic nervous system state, which then helps to support the body to rest and digest. So if you are wanting to eat more food or to start eating regularly, then there’s some practices that you can start maybe even, like, before you start preparing food and while you’re preparing it. So that when you do eat the food, your body is going to digest, and then it’s going to remind the body that, oh, it’s safe. Like, it’s safe to eat food right now. It’s safe to digest.

Filipa Bellette [00:32:13]:
And and then you’re retraining your body to know that it’s safe to eat, and so therefore, the appetite can start coming back. And then in terms of what to eat, I just keep it really simple. So there are some inflammatory foods that can make things worse that you could think about in terms of avoiding or avoiding sometimes or most of the time. I don’t know how people will feel about this, but caffeine, is an artificial stimulant for cortisol, which is your stress hormone that can put someone into adrenal fatigue if that’s depleting. So if you are in a state of fight or flight, I know that a lot of our clients when they start working with us, when I look at their food diary, it’s like, wow. Coffee in the morning and at lunchtime, and then you have your first meal at dinner. That’s that’s a huge stressor on the body. So if that can be reduced, or taken out of the diet while you’re in fight flight, then that’s going to be really helpful.

Filipa Bellette [00:33:12]:
And then also things like processed food, sugars, inflammatory foods that our body just doesn’t really know how to digest and what to do with it. Mhmm. So, essentially, you’re taking control of what you can take take control of in this moment. Yep. And if taking control of your diet is a quick win for you, then then go for it.

Lora Cheadle [00:33:32]:
Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:33:33]:
And keeping the meals simple. So and probably, like, more well cooked foods or liquid foods would be best if someone’s in that shutdown, fight flight freeze mode where they just have no appetite. Just starting off with small meals, like a small smoothie or a really nice broth. Soups, well cooked meals are going to be easier on the gut to digest. And then, again, you’re retraining your body to say to realize and remember that it’s safe to eat food and my appetite can come back.

Lora Cheadle [00:34:02]:
Yeah. I love that. Thank you. And that leads leads nicely, I think, into the lifestyle piece, because, you know, you talked about breath and there are moments in our life, like finding out about infidelity where it’s not our normal lifestyle, but it’s also a really, I believe, good opportunity to start rebuilding a healthy lifestyle. Because as long as everything’s falling apart anyway, and like you said, we’re retraining the body, let’s retrain it to crave healthy foods. Let’s retrain it without sugar and caffeine. What are some of these lifestyle things that people can do to start rebuilding a healthier lifestyle?

Filipa Bellette [00:34:45]:
Yeah. So, again, if we’re talking about this context of I’ve just found out about my husband’s or my partner’s infidelity, and I’m in fight, flight, freeze, shutdown mode, moving the body, especially if someone’s showing up with functional freeze. So that’s where you almost feel like, like, you can’t do anything. You’re shut down. There’s low motivation, but your mind is very busy. So that’s the definition of functional freeze. For if that is happening in the nervous system, then some and you talked about earlier, I think before we hit record, that you do a lot of somatic stuff. So moving the body, some like, whether it’s whether it’s as simple as, havening.

Filipa Bellette [00:35:31]:
So, stroking your arms, hugging yourself, yoga, going for a walk, but take your shoes off and ground on the earth. Like, when I talk about movement, when someone’s in a state of burnout and shutdown, I do not mean go into a marathon or crossfit. Yep. It’s more these gentle movements that can actually help to thaw the body, and connect us back into our body as well. Because a lot of the times when we get stuck in this stress state, we become quite dissociative, and we’re not even aware of the cues of our body, which is another reason why we lose our appetite. It’s like we just we’re dissociated from the cues from our body. So getting back to the body with movement, and by movement too, that would be breath. Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:36:18]:
That’s going to bring you back and connect you back to yourself. Yep. Sleep is so important, but this can be a little bit hard for someone who’s just found out something horrible. Because often, you will ruminate it on it, and you can’t go to sleep. And I know for me, like, I have definitely had periods of insomnia when when stress was very high, when there was uncertainty, and I was feeling like there was lack of control.

Lora Cheadle [00:36:47]:
Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:36:48]:
And no amount of sleep hygiene helped in those points of time.

Lora Cheadle [00:36:52]:
No. It doesn’t. It doesn’t.

Filipa Bellette [00:36:54]:
In saying that, you can still do that to support your body and just to remind your your your body’s cycle, like, your sleep wake cycle that, oh, it’s time to go to sleep. I would my best piece of advice would be to not accept not being able to fall asleep, but maybe in a way, like, surrender into it as just data. Yeah. It’s like big big things are happening at the moment. I’m really struggling to go to sleep. I’m ruminating on this. I can’t get into a restful state, and that’s okay because a big thing’s happening at the moment. And this is purely just my body saying it’s not safe at the moment.

Filipa Bellette [00:37:36]:
And so and so rather than fighting against that, surrendering or yielding into that and then accessing the message from the body.

Lora Cheadle [00:37:46]:
Mhmm. Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:37:47]:
Yeah. And then I mean, you can definitely check-in, like, Epsom salt baths and, like, off screens before bed and all that sort of stuff or, like, a sleepy meditation hypnosis track. And that might help, but I don’t know. I’m just talking from personal experience that I the fastest way I could get back into restful sleep was to surrender into the no sleep and to ask questions and to uncover what’s going on. And in the moment that I create safety again inside of myself or in my environment, sleep is sleep is the outcome.

Lora Cheadle [00:38:18]:
Yeah. Yeah. I really appreciate that you said it’s you can’t sleep because it’s not safe to sleep. And with that, you can’t force that when you don’t feel safe. It’s not something you can hammer and force. It’s it’s like when you said you don’t wanna run a marathon. You wanna do things gently. And I think in our society, it’s been so trained into us to always do more.

Lora Cheadle [00:38:42]:
You can succeed. You can climb that ladder. Do more. Do more. Do more. And there’s times where that’s not going to help. Do less is what’s going to help.

Filipa Bellette [00:38:52]:
Mhmm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Do less. Less, less, less is more. Absolutely.

Lora Cheadle [00:38:58]:
And then that third piece you mentioned was the functional medicine. And you’ve spoken to this a little bit, but I would like you to say a little bit more for people who are like, well, I kinda know what that is, but I kind of don’t know what that is. And do I need insurance? And is this pharmaceuticals? Or is this a doctor? And how does this work with traditional health care? And just give us a little description of that so everybody knows exactly what that is.

Filipa Bellette [00:39:27]:
Yeah. Cool. So now this might be dependent on the practitioner or doctor and what state they work in. Being in Australia, we actually have a virtual health practice, so we work with people all over the world. It is out of pocket, so it isn’t covered by insurance. Although, I’m hoping that in the near future, the standard medical system will realise how scientifically backed these tests are and the protocols are because people get great results. But it is so you would be looking for someone who has who has a qualification in either natural therapies or you might have a a medical doctor, but they have extra training in functional medicine. Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:40:12]:
And this is where we’re looking at the body systems as an intricate whole. So the difference between functional medicine and, say, standard medicine where there’s lab tests and stuff happening there is that you might you might have a, I don’t know, like a migraine issue, for example, and you get sent to a neuro neuro doctor. Or you might have a gut issue, and you get sent to a gastro doctor. Now it’s very reductionist because in that system, that specialist only knows a lot of information about that one part of the body, whereas all of our body systems are interconnected. So it’s very holistic, from a physical point of view, functional medicine is, because we’re looking at other body systems. And some of those body systems that go beyond what GPs or medical specialists would test for would be things like adrenal fatigue, which we were talking about earlier, looking at neurotransmitters. It blows my mind that psychiatrists are not testing brain chemicals when they’re giving antidepressants. Because there’s all sorts of antidepressants you can give.

Filipa Bellette [00:41:20]:
And I’m just like, you have like, we can get information around what someone might need and what someone might respond better to and what might be the better option if you test. We also look into the mitochondria so that they’re the little organelles that convert food into energy. This is a big part of a burnout presentation as well. So if you’re exhausted, especially if you’re exhausted after trying to physically exert yourself, whether it’s work or exercise. Often, that’s a sign that the mitochondria have become damaged, and you’re not converting energy, very effectively. We also look into the gut, so the microbiome, and looking at pathogens, and digestive organs, and leaky gut, and also the detoxification system, which is a really important part of overall health. If you’re not clearing toxins from your body and they’re getting stored in fat tissues, that is a huge inflammatory stressor that is happening in your system that just compounds, the burnout symptoms. Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:42:19]:
Mhmm.

Lora Cheadle [00:42:20]:
It compounds everything.

Filipa Bellette [00:42:22]:
Yeah.

Lora Cheadle [00:42:22]:
You know? It it’s really just one of those things that it’s going nowhere. It’s going nowhere good. Whether this is a temporary thing or whether this has been a long term thing. And like you said, this is just the straw that broke the camel’s back. Yeah. Clearing your gut, clearing the toxins, just like you were saying, you can’t heal in a toxic environment around you. You also can’t heal with a toxic body environment.

Filipa Bellette [00:42:48]:
Yeah. Yeah. That is so true. It is so true. Yeah. So functional medicine is also, like, there’s a term around it as well is root cause medicine. So it’s looking at not just identifying, oh, these are the body systems that are out of whack. Here, take a supplement.

Filipa Bellette [00:43:05]:
It’s also looking at why why has that happened in the first place? And a lot of standard functional medicine practices, I feel, just look at surface level root causes. So things like what we were talking about earlier. What are you eating? How are you moving? You know, stress is a big part of it, but there’s a lot of pracies that just say, oh, yes. Stress causes that too. But they don’t have great, recommendations or processes or methods to be able to actually address why the person is stressed out in the first place. So in our practice, we go deeper into the unconscious mind as well. And one of the big things that we focus on from an unconscious level is who are you? Like, what do you believe about yourself? Because, essentially, that is the machine that’s driving thoughts and feelings and patterns and the way that you’re perceiving yourself and the existence in this world and even your ability to heal as well. We get a lot of people who have had chronic health issues that they have actually created unconscious core beliefs that they’re broken, that they’re the one that can’t be healed.

Filipa Bellette [00:44:09]:
Often, it’s hidden. We need to, like, dig to find it, but then it’s like, oh my gosh. That’s why you have responded to all those protocols.

Lora Cheadle [00:44:16]:
Yes. Yes. And I again, there’s so many similarities here. There is such great overlap. I too, as a lawyer, you have to get to the root cause. You know, it doesn’t matter if you’re treating the symptoms. Sure. You might be able to feel better, but what does it matter if you’re going to keep recreating the same problem?

Filipa Bellette [00:44:35]:
Yeah.

Lora Cheadle [00:44:36]:
So I really, really appreciate that. And yes, those core beliefs, those unconscious core beliefs, who am I? What do I deserve? How do I deserve to be treated? These are really, really important things. And it’s shocking, I think, to so many people that they’re even there because most people, if you say, how do you feel about yourself? They’re like, oh, fine. Yeah. I’m sure. Self esteem, self worth, it’s it’s all fine. Yeah. Maybe I could do some more, but it’s fine.

Lora Cheadle [00:45:05]:
Fine. Fine. Fine. Yep. Yep. Yeah. And it’s but it’s not.

Filipa Bellette [00:45:09]:
Yeah. Yeah. I know. I’m always like, the proof is in the pudding. Uh-huh. How come these patterns are still showing up? They’re like, okay. There’s more work to be done.

Lora Cheadle [00:45:21]:
Yes. And what I wanna say to the listeners who are thinking, like, are you kidding? Now I have more work to do. Are you kidding? This is just depressing. I just I just do what I do. This is not there is no shame in this. We all have this. We were all raised in a society, in a culture, in a family, in a religion. We have all adopted these beliefs without conscious thought.

Filipa Bellette [00:45:47]:
Yeah.

Lora Cheadle [00:45:48]:
We have just become who we are, and the opportunity to start unpacking it is truly a gift. And when you can reframe it, I believe as, oh God, now I have to do this to wow, what can I uncover? This is gonna be interesting. And when you realize it’s in service of making you feel better, making you become better, truly being able to live your life the way that you want it, it’s empowering and it’s exciting.

Filipa Bellette [00:46:21]:
Yeah. I I so agree. We I actually use a bit of a metaphor with our clients because they are doing the lab testing side of things as well. Yeah. And it’s very rare that I’ll get a client where we’re looking over their lab tests and looking at their physical imbalances, where they’re feeling like guilt and shame and embarrassment, and they wanna run away. 99.9% of the time, they’re like, oh, wow.

Lora Cheadle [00:46:45]:
Not exciting.

Filipa Bellette [00:46:46]:
Oh, I thought I had that. Oh, that makes so much sense. And so it’s just so interesting that then when it’s like, okay. Why did this happen? Let’s dig deeper. All of a sudden, it’s like, oh, I don’t wanna look at that. That’s uncomfortable. But, essentially, it’s the same thing. It’s like, hey.

Filipa Bellette [00:47:03]:
Let’s just look at it with curiosity, with courage and kindness. It’s the most loving thing you can do, by the way. Mhmm. And just in the same way you looked at your lab test markers with excitement and curiosity, let’s do that with the deeper unconscious inner stuff as well because we all have it. Like, you’re not you’re not weird. You’re actually really normal. Mhmm. And you’re not that special that you’re the only one with weird stuff happening.

Filipa Bellette [00:47:29]:
No. We’re all special.

Lora Cheadle [00:47:32]:
Yeah. We all have this happening. And, you know, this is a bit of a tangent, but I also think it’s really important. I want you, dear listeners, to think about yourself and to think about your partner who cheated. People don’t cheat because they’re healthy and they’re happy and they’re completely regulated and they feel great about themselves in their life. Cheating is an act of desperation when you don’t feel good and you don’t know what else to do. We were talking earlier about things being under the surface, stress, health, all this stuff. I fully believe that in order to heal yourself, your relationship, your life, your burnout, your family, all of that.

Lora Cheadle [00:48:22]:
This is important for both of you. If you are trying to work things out with your partner, you both need to be healthy. You both need to be monitoring your alcohol intake. You both need to have adequate levels of dopamine. You both need to be doing this. And I am a proponent of all things. If you want marriage counseling, do it. If you want coaching, that’s my favorite.

Lora Cheadle [00:48:49]:
Do that. But also as a somatic attachment therapist, I am convinced that the body does keep the score. Body burnout is real. If you can start with that physical body, you will feel better. Your mind will feel better. You will be more clear, and you will both make better progress along the way.

Filipa Bellette [00:49:11]:
Yeah. I love that. I love that. I love what you said at the start too that someone who cheats

Lora Cheadle [00:49:20]:
Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:49:21]:
It there’s something going on. Like, they’re not healthy, not regulated. And have you heard of Tony Robbins’ 6 core needs? Certainty, variety, loving connection, significance, growth

Lora Cheadle [00:49:36]:
Oh.

Filipa Bellette [00:49:37]:
Contribution.

Lora Cheadle [00:49:39]:
Okay.

Filipa Bellette [00:49:40]:
It’s a it’s Heard, but

Lora Cheadle [00:49:42]:
I don’t know what it is. Like, I’ve heard about it, but I don’t know all the details. So

Filipa Bellette [00:49:46]:
Okay. Essentially, they’re, like, their 6 core needs that every human being is is trying to give themselves. And so if someone is healthy and regulated and, you know, they’ve done the work to uncover childhood beliefs and programming, they’re going to just naturally meet the needs those 6 core needs in a resourceful way. And and the proof is in the pudding. So if love and significance and connection is met in a resourceful way, you’re going to have a healthy relationship with an intimate partner. Like, both of you are going to show up that way. Yes. And then but if it’s being met unresourcefully because there’s stuff that hasn’t been dealt with physically, metaphysically, like, body and mind, it’s all connected, then then, yeah, that’s that’s when things go wrong because someone’s trying to seek significance Mhmm.

Filipa Bellette [00:50:43]:
In in a way that is unresourceful and untrustworthy. And

Lora Cheadle [00:50:48]:
yeah. And it’s not gonna work. So you had said that you since you work virtually, you can work with people everywhere. How can people find out about you? And do they mail samples to you? Do they mail samples to a lab? How how would it look like to start working with you?

Filipa Bellette [00:51:10]:
Yeah. So, our website is www.chrisandphilly.fm. Maybe put the spelling in the show notes. Yes. Absolutely. So that’s that’s where you can find us online. But in terms of, like, the logistics of lab testing, so we’re hooked up with lab companies across the world. So if you’re in if you’re not in Australia or if you if you’re in a different part of the country, we still organize all the lab tests and, you know, if there’s supplement protocols or whatever.

Filipa Bellette [00:51:42]:
But you’re you’re doing it in your region so that those specimens stay, fresh. Plus, there’s custom issues as well. I actually don’t think Australia, you can send specimen samples into the Australian lab. So that’s how we how we work around to help to make sure that we can help people around the world.

Lora Cheadle [00:52:03]:
Nice. Nice. Nice. Nice. Yeah. And, again, listeners, I just encourage you to to explore this, to reach out. You know, I’m big on mind, body, spirit, energy. Bodies are important.

Lora Cheadle [00:52:16]:
Movement is important, but giving yourself the right nutrition, the right lifestyle, the right opportunity to feel good is really helpful. So thank you so much for sharing your wisdom, especially for talking about getting to the root cause to get to the core because you’re right. Burnout just doesn’t happen. It’s not we don’t have to accept it as a normal part of life.

Filipa Bellette [00:52:43]:
Yeah. Thank you so much. I really enjoyed our conversation.

Lora Cheadle [00:52:47]:
I did too. Thank you so much. Listeners, I will absolutely put the, information, the contact information, the website, all of that in the show notes. Reach out if you’ve got any questions. As a reminder, my new book drops January 21st. It’s not burnout. It’s betrayal. 5 tools to fuel up and thrive.

Lora Cheadle [00:53:10]:
And, you know, I’ve got more of the tools that talk about going into that root cause, but absolutely reach out to Philly to start getting those body based numbers, tools to start making yourself feel better. Have an amazing week. And as usual, always remember to flaunt exactly who you are because who you are is always more than enough. Whether you’ve been listening to the show for a while or this is one of your first times, what I want you to know is this. There is so much hope. There is so much possibility, and there is so much goodness and power and strength that can be created from this situation. And I know that not only because I am on the other side, and I am happier and more self confident and secure than I ever was before, but I have worked with so many of you who tell me the same thing. And that’s why I offer free consultations, because I know what’s possible for you, and I can hold that vision for you even when you can’t formulate that vision for yourself.

Lora Cheadle [00:54:30]:
This is why I do what I do because when I was in your shoes, there was nobody there to do this. Yes. I have a therapist. My therapist helped me process things, but I needed somebody there who would hold me accountable, who could be my wise guide, who could give me the insight, who could, like, tell me and call me out on the things where I was gaslighting myself, when my partner was saying something that didn’t make sense. I needed that wise friend, that wise voice to coach me through and to help me make sense of all the things that I was learning in therapy, on podcast, from all of the 10,000 books I think that I read to get through this. And that’s what I’m here for. I can get you to the other side. I can help you formulate that vision for yourself, for your life.

Lora Cheadle [00:55:27]:
And then I can hold loving space for you so you can get there. I can be your accountability partner. I can be that wise and loving voice. I can give you insight. I think more than anything, I am gonna speak truth to you. I’m gonna tell you when I think it sounds like gaslighting, either from somebody else or from yourself to yourself. Because what I really want is for you to rise up, for you to create the most beautiful life because of this. I really want you to be as happy as I am, as secure as I feel in myself and is in my life that, quite frankly, I never would have gotten here if it wasn’t for the infidelity.

Lora Cheadle [00:56:22]:
So reach out 30 minutes free. Just me, just you, just talking so you can see what it’s like to truly have somebody walk by your side and whisper in your ear every step of the way, guiding you to exactly where you want to be. Go to my website, lauracheedle.com. That’s lora cheadle.com. And you can book your appointment right there from my website, lauracheadle.com. Again, just me, just you whispering in your ear, walking by your side, holding you accountable, giving you that wisdom and that guidance, and most importantly, the love and the support that you deserve and that you need in order to get through this situation and become who you really want to become at the end of the day. So lauracheedle.com, and I really look forward to seeing you. Life can really knock you down sometimes, especially after a tough breakup or when someone betrays your trust.

Lora Cheadle [00:57:29]:
It’s hard to remember your own value when the people who should have treasured you didn’t. But I’m here to tell you that loving yourself again is possible even after infidelity. It takes time and intentional effort, but it can be done. That’s where the Mindful Souls subscription box comes in. It’s like getting a monthly dose of me time delivered straight to your door. Inside, you’ll find all sorts of goodies, natural crystals, gorgeous gem jewelry, essential oils, and many other pampering tools. It’s a nice little reminder that, hey, you do deserve to feel good. I know that most of you are crazy busy.

Lora Cheadle [00:58:13]:
You’ve got a ton of people counting on you and taking care of yourself usually ends up at the bottom of your to do list. But that’s what’s so great about this subscription. They don’t just deliver everything you need for your self care moments. They also give you real, practical tips on how to make self care work for you no matter how hectic your life gets. I’ve been a die hard fan of the Mindful Box for a while now, so the Mindful Souls family sent me a special treat for all of you. If you use the discount code Lora 25, you’ll get 25% off your order. That’s l o r a 25. So head over to mindful souls.com and grab your box.

Lora Cheadle [00:58:59]:
Tune in next time to flaunt, find your sparkle, and create a life you love after infidelity or betrayal with Lora Cheadle every Wednesday at 7 AM and 7 PM Eastern Standard Time on syndicated DreamVision 7 Radio Network. Uncover the truth of what’s possible for you on the other side of betrayal and develop the skills and strategies necessary to embrace the future and flourish today. Download your free betrayal recovery toolkit at betrayalrecoveryguide.com.