Bringing Your Partner on Board so You Can Both Heal After Infidelity

Narrator [00:00:01]:

You're listening to FLAUNT!, find your sparkle, and create a life you love after infidelity or Have you been betrayed by life, your body, or someone that you love? You're not alone. No matter what you've been through, naked, self worth, helps you regain confidence, joy, and enthusiasm so you can create a life you love, and flourish, tune in weekly, and learn how.

Lora Cheadle [00:00:32]:

To all the women who have cried in the shower, smiled when they wanted to scream and couldn't wait to get home and unhook their bra. Flint is the definitive guide book on how to get back in touch with who you are underneath your labels, roles, and scripts. Fall in love with yourself right now. Read life into the dreams you left behind and live each with uninhibited joy. Pick up a copy of Lora Cheetle's number one best selling book FLAUNT!. Drop your cover and reveal your smart sexy and spiritual self wherever books are sold. It's available in print, digital, and audio formats, and comes with 2 downloadable meditations.

Lora Cheadle [00:01:11]:

This podcast is sponsored by Better Help. Have you been struggling lately? relationship issues impact every area of your life. When I found out about my husband's infidelity, I was so devastated. I could barely function. sleeping was impossible because I couldn't shut off my brain. Evening was a challenge because I felt nauseous all the time, and for the 1st month or so, everything felt pointless. Whether you're having trouble sleeping, feeling hopeless, or just can't focus, better help is here to help you, better help offers licensed therapists who are trained to listen and help. You can talk to your therapist in a private online environment at your convenience There's a broad range of expertise and better helps 20,000 plus therapists network that gives you access to help that might not be available in your area. Just fill out a questionnaire to help assess your specific needs, and then you'll be matched with a therapist in under 24 hours. Then you can schedule secure video and phone sessions, plus you can exchange unlimited messages and everything you share is completely confidential.

Lora Cheadle [00:02:20]:

I know the confidentiality was important for me, especially early on when

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Lora Cheadle [00:03:28]:

Hello, and welcome to FLAUNT!. Find your sparkle and create a life you love after infidelity or betrayal. I'm Lora Cheadle, and today we're gonna talk about something that nobody else is ever going to talk to you about. We are going to talk about how to get your partner on board. How to get your partner on board to heal after they have betrayed you? And yeah. That's a tall order. And no. You don't have complete control over it because Everybody has got personal agency, but you do have a lot of control. You have way more power than you think. And here's the other thing I wanna say about this. This is not necessarily about getting them to come back to you and to save the relationship. What it's about is it's about getting them on board for their personal healing. for their growth, for their development. So they can be a better human

Now you might be thinking, why do I care about them being a better human? And let me tell you why. If you're with them, They have the chance of being the partner that you have always wanted them to be. And if they're not going to be with you and you're co parenting with them, they're going to be the father. And again, I'm just gonna use this in gender terms assuming that it was the man that cheated, even though that's not always the case at all, just because it's easier to talk about. They will be the parent. They will be the father that you wanted. They will raise your kids better because they are fully self aware because they are healed because they are healthy, whole, and complete. And then the third reason is they will just be a better human for themselves.

And let me just call this one out too. You married them at one point. You were in a relationship with them at one point. You loved them at one point. And chances are, even though you're going through this infidelity and betrayal journey, you still love them. you still love a lot of them, not all of them, but at least a part of that. And if there's any love there, whether it's past or present or future, you will want them to be a better person because the fact of the matter is we want people that we love and care about to be better people. So those are the three reasons that it matters. Those are the three reasons why you are going to want to get them on board so they can heal.

Okay. Let's talk about the first one. That is bringing them back into the relationship. How can you get them on board to heal to become a better person to come back into the relationship without losing yourself. That's a big one without losing yourself, without pandering, without pretending, without all of that. Okay. You were hurt. You are the one that is betrayed. and it's not freaking fair. It's not freaking fair that you were betrayed, and it's also not freaking fair that now you have to be the bigger person if you want to be the catalyst for their healing journey. So let's just get that out of the way first. It's really not fair. It's not fair at all that you have to be the catalyst, but what I'm telling you is you do have to be catalyst for their healing journey. And again, it's like, are you kidding me? They destroyed me. They gutted me. They lied to me. They cheated. They did all of this stuff. And now you're telling me I have to be the catalyst for them. I have to hold space for them and for their shame and for their humiliation, for their embarrassment, and for their bad behavior.

And yeah. Sadly. Yeah. And here's why. If they were capable if they were capable of holding space for their own healing, they probably wouldn't have cheated in the first place. If they were capable of doing the work and self reflecting and going inside, and feeling their feelings and processing their emotions and understanding what was going on they probably wouldn't have cheated in the first place because so often and again, All situations are different, but so often the reason that they cheat is because they're completely not self aware They are completely in pain. They're struggling. They're traumatized, and they don't know how to handle their emotions. and cheating is a tool.

Cheating is a horrible destructive tool, but it is a tool. It's a tool that people use in order to feel better. The person who cheat on on you was not feeling good about themselves. they didn't know how to handle their emotions. They didn't know how to do anything. how to identify what was going on, how to communicate what was going on. They didn't know what tools to use to help them feel better. So what did they use? They used a bad tool. Drinking is a tool. Drugs are a tool. cheating is a tool. Self destructive behavior is a tool. They're all tools. All of our behaviors are tools. Some people's stonewall is a tool because they don't know how to handle it. Some people get really anxious and lean in and they try to talk and they follow somebody around and tester, it's a tool to help them feel better. It's all tools.

Cheating is a tool. So if you want them to actually start healing, to actually start realizing, hey. I was in pain, and I didn't know how to handle it. and they use this dysfunctional tool. You need to be the 1 because oftentimes they don't just go to a therapist right away, which I wish they would, but that's not realistic. You need to be the one that holds that space for them that gives them that glimmer of hope, that little tiny moment of grace. where you can hover above the situation and go around to their point of view into a express your understanding of what they went through and what they are still going through. And, yes, I hear you saying that's not fair, and it's not fair. And it might not work. because they might not be ready to hold anything or to address anything. They might still be heading towards rock bottom.

But if this was their rock bottom moment and if they get that compassion from you, that little gray from you, that moment from you, then they might just might. Have that moment that they need where they go. Okay. I can do this. I am brave enough to do this. I am courageous enough, and I can do this. So here's how. The first thing you need to do is truly understand that they were in pain that cheating is an act born of pain. that it's a tool that people use when they are hurting, when they are in pain. You have to not be defensive in this moment. in just this tiny little moment, you have to not be defensive, and you have to feel that compassion and that understanding for what they were going through that led them to cheat. And I can help you with that.

That's one of the things that this podcast has done a lot If you haven't already listened to the 3 episodes that I do with my husband because it will help you understand his pain, his point of view, what was going on within him, his psyche, his emotions, his body, when he made the choice to cheat. And that's something that's hard. because we want to get so in our own story. We want to get so into the, but what about me? What about our family? What about our kids? What about the neighbors? What about the church? What about vows? What about what about what about? Yes. What about all that? We will address all of that. You need to address all of that for you, for your healing journey, for your understanding. But if you want your partner on board, you have to step back and see things from their point of view first. Not fair. Not fair. totally give you that, but you have to see things from their point of view.

First, you are the catalyst in this. because think about it. What caused this whole problem? You know me? I'm a lawyer. I always like to get to the root cause of things. What caused this whole thing was their cheating? Their cheating, their choice, what caused their cheating, their choice, was their pain. They were the ones that made the decision, not you. This is not about you. It never was you and ever will be about you, it's about them. They made the decision. This is their choice. So what do we have to do to resolve this to move to the next level, we have to start with that decision point. If you think about it like one of those little graphs where it's like little v's and it branches off, That's that decision point? Do I cheat? Yes or do I cheat? No. We have to go to that decision point, and we have to find out what was going on with them in that moment that they made where you're at now rewind. Get to their decision. and put yourself in their shoes at that decision point.

And when I say put yourself in their shoes, I don't mean stand there in your shoes and say, I never would have done this. I would have talked to you. I would have shared. I would have whatever. That's not you in that decision point. I mean, that's not them in their decision point. That's you in their decision point. You need to stand there with their trauma, with their pain, and with their lack of abilities and their lack of skills. And just for a moment, see if you can put yourself there. had I been raised by the people you were raised by? Have I experienced the things in life that you had experienced? Have I misperceived your behavior? Have I misjudged? Had I been there with all of your perceptions, warped or real? with all of your beliefs warped or real. With all of your pain warped or real, would I have made the same decision. Yeah. I can see why I would have made that decision where I truly in your shoes were were I truly have not have these abilities?

If I truly would have been there, I can see how this might have been a tool that you picked up and tried. Once you can get yourself there, that's when then you can communicate to your partner. Had I truly been in your shoots? Had I truly had your skills, your beliefs, your thoughts. I could at least understand sort of how you thought this tool might have helped you. God, that's hard to do. It really is because we wanna go into our own story. We wanna go into our own journey. but I would have thought about our family, but I would have thought about our vows, but I never would have. Keep it about them in that moment, and keep it about your expression of compassion and understanding for them in that moment. because if you wanna break down somebody's walls, you have to bring down yours. In therapy, in the psychology world, one of the things we talk about is co regulation. In co regulation in a very, very basic nutshell is that we regulate with the people around us.

So if you're in a room full of people who are agitated, you will become agitated. It's like when around election cycles. Everybody starts amping up because everybody's amped up. It's you're co regulating. The more news you watch with fired up people, the more fired up you get. When you're in a room with people meditating and doing yoga, you will start calming down. The more happy calm people you were around, the happier and calm you become. We co regulate. We regulate with those around us. And when we're upset, that's why we seek out another person who is our safe space. who was our calm person. That's why we go to a coach, a counselor, a friend. And we're like, and they bring us back down because we are seeking to regulate ourselves by being with them. So what you are intentionally doing as the first step of getting your partner on board to heal and become the best version of themselves is you are getting yourself in that calm place of understanding in compassion and grace, and then you were showing up, putting yourself in front of them, either literally or via email or text or whatever. And you were just letting them know I understand you. I see you. I understand you. because when somebody is seen, and I mean, truly seen.

That's when the walls start coming down. That's when we start feeling safe with each other again. and that's when we can lean into our healing journey. because, as you know, I say this, betrayal uncovers the truth. If you want to heal, you need to uncover the truth. Uncovering the truth means they have uncover the truth of everything that they did and their pain and their fear and their shame and their humiliation. and you have to uncover things within you too. Your wounds, your fear, your shame, your pain, your humiliation, and you have to do that with each other where you are standing, emotionally metaphorically naked with each other saying this, is me. And I'm not afraid, and I have laid myself there. And you can love me, or you can leave me, but this is who I am. And this is my final act of strength. which is the surrender. The surrendering of the masks. The surrendering. of the shame, the fear, the covering the hiding.

And, yeah, don't we all wish our cheating partner would just walk in and say, here I am. Ready to open myself up and lay my soul there. and here's all my shame. And here's all my pain. And here's all my humiliation and embarrassment over what I did. And you know what? They're not going to do that. That's why cheating is so hard because even if they want to, so many men don't know how to do it. So they can be sitting there and everything inside of them is like, I want to do this. I want to heal. I want to understand myself. I want better tools. but they don't know how to start. Again, it's stereotypical, and

I'm just going there for ease of conversation. But typically, women are better communicators. Typically, one party in the relationship does drive the relationship train. And women are more into self help traditionally and women are better able to communicate traditionally. So usually it is the woman that is pulling the relationship. forward. And yes, even though especially though. You have been hurt. You also need to be the one here to start the ball rolling. There are a couple of different layers to a fair recovery. You need to heal yourself. Absolutely. You need to reclaim your power. You need to rebuild your identity. You need to get a firm handle on your self worth. You need to do all of that because being betrayed really does destroy so much of your sense of self. but you also have the opportunity in betrayal to rebuild the relationship.

Again, in whatever form, whether it's back to a partnership, whether it's co parenting, whether it's just somebody that I used to know, you have the chance to rebuild the relationship as well. And so often oh, it drives me crazy, so many other coaches completely neglect that aspect of things. If you're in a partnership with somebody and you have been for a long time, you need to have some sort of a resolution with that relationship. And here's the thing. Yes. I also say there really is no such thing as resolution and closure in a lot of situations. And that's because people don't understand that that it's about me and it's about us. Yes. You need to do the work individually, but you also need to figure out what happened with us, do what you can do to close that gap, to bridge that gap and to heal what was us and to figure out how to move forward. It's a game. Whether it's tennis, whether it's volleyball, whether it's something, it's a volley back and forth between two people. A relationship is a game. and there's this back and forth. And if you're constantly lobbing the ball and they're not returning it, you don't have a game. You don't have any resolution because you can't spend the rest of your life being like, hey. I'm here throwing the ball over. And, boy, let's play and figure this out. Hey, you can't do that.

You can't come to a resolution when you're the only one playing the game. You need to have your partner playing the game. You need to have them volley the ball back. Otherwise, you don't have a game. Otherwise, you have desperation. Desparation is you being the one that keeps balling the ball over. I'm here. I'm here. I'm driving. How often was that the case in your marriage before you found out about infidelity? Truth bomb. So many of us are like, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. I'm doing it. You can't save a relationship on your own. You can do a lot of the work. But you have to have your partner send the ball back, send the ball back because a relationship is two people.

So If you want resolution around infidelity, if you want resolution around betrayal, you need to get that game going. You need to lob the ball and they need to send it back. How do you get them involved in playing the game? That's what the show is about. The first thing you need to do is stop making it about you just for a second. walk around to their side of the net and see the situation in their shoes, not just from their point of view, but in their shoes. And that's hard because we're so hurt, because we're so angry, because we're so confused. But if we can truly suspend that within ourselves temporarily, not permanently. I'm gonna say that again, we're suspending our self and our position and all of the things that we need momentarily. Not forever. Not forever, just momentarily, to get them involved in the game.

And is it worth it Yeah. It's worth it because then we can get our resolution because then we could make sense of it all. So yes. Is it hard? Yes. Is it unfair? Yes. If you can just do that for a moment and get them involved in the game, it's worth it. So once they're involved in the game, then you, again, it's all about you, then you're the one that needs to regulate that. That needs to regulate the healing that needs to give them their airtime, and then you give them a little and then they give you a little, and you need to create that balance because what do we wanna do? We are in pain. We hurt, we want to vomit all of our stuff on them, and we want to find out everything, all the time, and are we entitled to? Yes. But is it going to give us what we want ultimately?

No. Again, is it fair? No. but we need to self regulate. We need to constantly monitor where they are at, how triggered they are, how much they can take on. What is their capacity? And then we start working this relationship. going back to the sports analogy because I do like that one and having the game and lobbing the ball back and forth if you were seeing your opponent is exhausted and is not focusing on the ball and keeps missing shots. you need to step back and you need to let them catch their breath. You need to let them refuel. You need to let them do whatever it is that gives them the energy to come back to this game.

And, again, crazy as it sounds because you're the hurt partner. You're the one that's been victimized. You need to stand in the strength and the truth and the power, and you need to do that for them. And here's why. What they are experiencing is humiliation. Shame, intense emotions that are as far down the emotional scale as you can imagine.

Anger is higher up on the emotional scale. All of the sadness is higher up on the emotional scale, the lowest of low. the emotions that shut us down as humans and get us to run and disengage and do everything to protect ourselves, our shame, and humiliation, and embarrassment. Can you imagine this shape? and the humiliation and the embarrassment of being the one that train wrecks your marriage, of being the one that cheats, of bring the one who the breaks vows that hurts your family that destroys your kids that moves into like this. Ew, a sexual thing. It's horrible. And the reason they are so jerky is because they're covering that. It's defensive behavior.

Doing what you can do to help them overcome just a little bit is gonna put them back in the game and is going to get you what you want ultimately. So how you do it is you buy. Swallowing hard, taking a deep breath, digging deep in extending as much compassion and grace and understanding as you can for them. in their situation and for the bad, toxic, horrible emotions that they are holding. because that's going to get them in the game.

Once they're in the game, again, it's you digging real deep. so you can manage this healing journey. And along the way, as you were both healing. and as they were lobbing the ball back to you, that's when you start figuring out. Do I wanna go forward in this relationship? And if so, how? Do I want to rebuild a partnership or marriage? Do I just want to co parents healthily with somebody? Do I just want the best parent possible for my kids? Do I wanna have some sort of a cordial relationship going forward, or is this just somebody that I I'm really wanting to just let go? and bless and release. But it's important in making that decision. to spend some time in their shoes, again, with the compassion and the grace. Why? When I was saying earlier that some of the more toxic emotions are humiliation, shame, and embarrassment.

Some other really, really toxic emotions are hatred and judgment. And quite frankly, if you were holding hatred and judgment towards your partner, The person that gets hurt is you. The person that gets hurt is you And then you go into embarrassment. Oh my god. I was cheated on. Shame. It wasn't good enough. How could they do this to me? judgment hatred, and it makes it worse for you. So in everything that I'm saying today, or I'm telling you to be the bigger person to put your needs second. It might seem so counterintuitive to what I do as a coach. to what I do helping women, to what I do empowering women to find clarity, encourage, and confidence. to go forward and live their fullest potential. It might seem so counterintuitive to hear me saying, so you gotta put yourself second.

Seconds or nothing. Yes. But this is why. It's not putting yourself second forever. You've probably put yourself second for a long time already for the greater good of your family, for the greater good of your kids, for the greater good of the community, For the greater good of the relationship, you're used to doing this. What I'm saying is this time, do it differently. This time, do it with intention and knowledge that I am doing this because it will tear down the walls of the other person. I am doing this because it's going to get me what I want in end. I'm doing this because it's going to where we're sending things back and forth. And where we are using this conversation, this dialogue, to heal together.

Both heal the relationship and myself and maybe even the other person. Together in a better, healthier, stronger way. So, yes, you're subduing yourself. along the way for the short term in order to get what you want. And no, it's not manipulation. because you're doing it intentionally. We've all seen, like, those videos of the abused dog you know, in the shelter. And they're, you know, either aggressive and they're barking or they're cowering in the corner. And then the trainer comes in, and the trainer is subduing them their normal personality and they're sitting soft and they're not making eye contact and they're hiding in the corner or they're offering food or they're bending down. They're giving the dog physical cues that, hey. I am a safe person. I can be trusted. I see your pain. I know you're being aggressive because you're in I know you're cowering because you're afraid. That's what you're doing. And it sounds really funny to be like, eat the dog trainer to the abuse dog. because she might be thinking, but I was the hippie's dog, not him. But that's what it is. It's you're intentionally doing something to get what you want. to do it.

If you have any hope of bringing the relationship back to a healthy place and to rebuilding that's what you've gotta do. And then like I also said, because it's not always about this, oh, relationship, happily ever after, It's also who do I want in my kid's life? How do I want to who do I want a divorce? if I'm gonna divorce, I wanna divorce a healthier person. I don't wanna divorce somebody who's in pain and who is that vicious dog barking at the fence. I wanna divorce somebody who can stand in their power who can own their shame. I wanna divorce a healthy person is better for me. I want a healthy person to parent my kids. And then like I was saying too, Even if you have no kids and this is just somebody you never want to have contact with, what part of you loved them? What part of you still still to this day loves them despite everything?

Don't you want them to be a better person? Don't you want them to have new skills going forward? new understanding of themselves of how they hurt you. of how they can do better for themselves and not create more hurt in the world. You know this if you've been listening to my podcast, but one of my favorite sayings and one of the things that got me through the betrayal recovery journey was that hurt people hurt people. Who here wants a better world? All of us. who here wants ourselves to be safe going forward, our kids to be safe going forward, our friends and family to be safe and happy and healthy going forward. All of us.

How do we create a better world? by having fewer hurt people. How do we have fewer hurt people? Well, by doing things like this, by digging deep, by extending compassion, by extending grace, by trying our hardest to understand even if we don't totally understand by being willing to walk around to the other person, to climb into their shoes, and to say show me. Help me understand because I don't get it, but I'm trying and I want to. by truly seeing other people. Because isn't that what we all want? We all wanna be scene. We wanna be heard. We wanna be understood. And sadly, when we've been victimized in the form of infidelity or betrayal, we're not gonna get that first. We're not gonna get that first because our partner was not capable of giving it to us first, or they wouldn't have cheated in the first place. So how do you know if you're the 1? How do you know if you're the one that has to take the first steps to create healing? You're the one if you've been cheated on.

This is the key to the whole show right here. How do you know if you're the one to do this work? Were you cheated on? Yes. Then you're the one that has to do this work. You're the one that has to start this healing journey. not only for yourself and your family, but ancestrally for the past and also for your legacy going forward because if you don't stop and do the healing work for yourself and for your partner.

Guess what legacy you're gonna pass down to your kids? You're gonna pass down a really unhealthy legacy. around shame, around humiliation, around embarrassment, around judgment, around sexuality, around relationships. around compassion, around love. Infidelity truly is the culminating experience of all of this. It is the greatest pain, and it is the greatest gift all at the same time. because it it allows you to see and to understand in a way you never would have before. So are you ready? Are you willing? Are you willing to do this work? Are you willing to bring your partner in because it's your partner who needs healing? It's your partner who needs understanding and being seen. It's your partner who needs to be brought into the game, into the party. and how they're going to do this through you. I love allegory, stories, parables. I love all of this. And one that I wanna share with you is around wolves.

I love wolves. Wolf culture. tends to be matriarchal. And how other wolves in the pack are accepted and brought in is through the female. If the female wolf tells the rest of the pack, then another wolf is okay, then that wolf is okay. The female wolf brings you in. The female Wulf brings you in the female. Wolf makes it okay. And that's how I feel it is for us. We are the ones that have to stand in that power of the female wolf and to bring in other people. We have to let our partner know. I will let you in, and I will make this okay. If you do the work, and here I am. Watch me. I will go first. Here I am. Laying myself there, laying myself open, and seeking to understand and to see you. And now that you have seen my bravery and my courage Can you start doing that for me? And I will hold you while you do that for me. And I will see you and understand you and I will help you with your pain if you will continue to do this for me, for us, for the And, yeah, I do find it beautiful. I do find it powerful. I find it sad. I find it unfair. but here's what I also know.

I know there is no one better suited to do that than you. I know there is no one better suited to do this than you, even in your pain. even in your despair. Even in your confusion, there is no one more powerful or better suited to do this work and to take this journey and to open themselves up and to bring their cheating partner in. than you. And that is what I ask you today. Are you willing? not only for yourself, but for your ancestors in the past and for your legacy in the future. Remember. It's not about subduing yourself for putting yourself last forever. It's not about stepping out of your power and being submissive.

It's not about saying, I forgive you when it's all good and you poor thing. It's not about any of that. It's about being so fully in your power that you know that nobody else can ever knock you off of your position. as sovereign queen of yourself in your own universe. It's about being so powerful -- that you are okay letting somebody go first, that you are okay holding the space for them because you know that you've got it and that they can't damage you no matter what. They can't damage you no matter what. They can't hurt you no matter what. because you were so fully in your power that you were able to do this. If you want help getting there, if you want help feeling that, if you want help knowing how to do it,

That's why I'm here. Oh my gosh. This is my greatest service to the world right here is helping you stand so fully in that power that you can do this. We can work together once. We can work together whenever you feel like it. You can just book an appointment. You could work with me for 6 months. You could work with me for a year. The choice is yours. Oh my gosh. Just reach out. Let's have an appointment. Let's connect. Let's talk. Let me help support you. Let me remind you of who you are and how powerful you are and how stunningly capable you are of doing this work to change everything for yourself and for others. Let me help you on this journey because I didn't, and it is the most worthwhile journey that I have ever done in my life. And I want to be the person that I wish I would have had when I was going through this. So reach out. Connect with me. The best way to do that is to go to betrayalrecoveryguide.com.

Download a very basic, very simple guide on three things to think about as you're going through this journey. But what will pop up is a little pop up in the right hand corner, and it says, need an emergency appointment? Click here and the answer is yes. I need that. Yes. and I wanna talk with you one on

Yes. I want to be that person, and I want to lead myself. and my partner and the whole freaking world to a better place. Show me how Lora, show me how. and we will together as often or as infrequent as you want. I am here. betrayal recovery guide.com.

Thank you so much. We're listening. I want you to let this one sink in. I really want you to let this one sink in. because it's a delicate balance. How do I stand so fully in my power that I can intentionally let myself take 2nd place for the greater good, for a short specific period of time in order to get what I want. Let me just say I am so done with women being in 2nd place permanently. I am so done with all of us seeking to please other people. to conform to what somebody else says we should be. This is not that.

This is by being so fully open and embodied that we recognize our own power and that we recognize what we need to do in order to get everybody else in line. But our greatest good and for the greater good of all of humanity. Before we close, I want you to take a couple of deep breaths, and I want you to move your shoulders And I want you to feel that energy around your body, that aura, that golden aura of power all around you. And I want you to take your hands up, whether it's at your chest level or all the way above your head reaching your palms up. And I just want you to feel, imagine, or pretend the golden sunlight is pouring into those paltz. Filling that aura with this golden power and purity, with this knowingness that who you are is so much more than enough. Knowing that no matter what anybody does to you.

They cannot damage who you are or how you feel. or what you are worth. Really feel the tingling the weight of all of that gold and sunshine in your palms and then take those hands to your heart. Let that gold and sunshine, that love, that power, that presence, that knowing poor into your heart. Drench your heart. with that pure golden power and the love. And just breathe. and allow yourself to be. I hope you have a beautiful week. And as usual, always remember to FLAUNT! exactly who you are. because who you are is always more. Vamana.

Lora Cheadle [00:51:13]:

Are you ready to break through and find out what's possible for you on the other side of betrayal. If you were tired of the anguish, the pain, the confusion, the overwhelm, or the obsessive thoughts, then reach out. Schedule your 1 on 1 hour long breakthrough call And together, we will figure out what you need to do to break through and get to the other side of betrayal. During our time together, you can explain what's going on with you.

Together, we will figure out what it is that's blocking you. Whether it's your partner's stubbornness or inability to move forward on the same page as you mindset, finances, concern about your kids. Whatever it is together, we will figure out what that block is and then we will put together a strategy so you can move ahead step by step and get to the other side of the trail. without overwhelm, without confusion, without being distracted, and losing focus. and wasting time, money, or your valuable energy. Isn't it time for you to get where you want to be? on the other side of this horrific situation, looking back with peace and perspective. When we get together, not only will you have that one on 1 hour long zoom call with me, but we'll also record it.

So everything will be memorialized, and you always will have something to go back to so you know your own personalized plan. And you will also receive 30 minutes of follow-up voxer support with me. so you won't lose track, so you won't get derailed. And so if you need something adjusted, together, we will be able to adjust it. To schedule your appointment, go to betrayal recovery guide .com and click on the pop up link, or reach out, Lora, l o r a, at Lora Cheadle, l o r a, cheadele.com, and let's get you scheduled. I can't wait to help you step back into your power and reclaim your identity, self worth, and create exactly the kind of life. that you love.

Lora Cheadle [00:54:08]:

To all the women who have cried in the shower, smiled when they wanted to scream and couldn't wait to get fall in love with yourself right now. Breathe life into the dreams you left behind and live each day with uninhibited joy. Pick up a copy of Lora Cheadle’s number one best selling book, FLAUNT!. Drop your cover and reveal your smart, sexy, and spiritual self wherever books are sold. It's available in print, digital, and audio formats, and comes with 2 downloadable meditations.

Lora Cheadle [00:54:49]:

Tune.

Narrator [00:54:54]:

or betrayal, with radio host and live choreographer, Lora Cheadle, every Wednesday at 7 AM and 7 PM EST, on syndicare dream visions 7 radio network develop naked self worth and reclaim your confidence, enthusiasm, and joy so you can create a life you love. and embrace who you are today. Download your free sparkle through betrayal recovery guide at naked self worth.com.