Confidence Isn’t Something You Find. It’s Something You Become

Woman in peach dress playing with her hair looking confident and joyful

Confidence is not something you have to find, fake, perform, or earn. It’s something you become.

In this special episode of FLAUNT!, Lora Cheadle, JD, CHt, leads you through a powerful conversation about confidence after infidelity and betrayal, followed by a full-length hypnosis session designed to help you reconnect with your worth, self-trust, and inner steadiness.

Because after betrayal, confidence can feel shattered. You may doubt yourself, your choices, your desirability, your intuition, and your ability to move forward. But real confidence is not perfection. It is not having it all together. It is not never feeling afraid, insecure, or unsure.

Real confidence is the grounded, embodied knowing that says, “I can be with myself through this. I can choose. I can speak. I can move. I can recover. I can fail spectacularly, and I can trust myself through it all.”

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In this episode, Lora shares a complete hypnosis experience that you can return to again and again whenever you need to reconnect with your confidence, calm your nervous system, and remember that you are worthy of a life you love.

As a certified clinical hypnotherapist, Lora explains how hypnosis works, why it is safe, and why it can be such a powerful and rapid tool for healing after betrayal. Hypnosis helps access the subconscious mind, where old fears, limiting beliefs, unhealed wounds, and protective patterns often live. Instead of trying to think your way into confidence from the conscious mind alone, hypnosis helps your body, mind, and subconscious come into alignment.

Use this hypnosis more than once! Save it. Come back to the hypnosis portion when you are resting, before bed, in the morning, or anytime you need a reset. The more you practice entering hypnosis, the easier and more effective it becomes.

Just do not use it while driving a car, operating any type of machinery, or any time you wish to maintain full awakened consciousness.

Find a comfortable, distraction-free space, allow yourself to relax, and return to this hypnosis whenever you need support.

After you have listened several times, notice what comes up. Notice what shifts. Notice where your subconscious leads you. Then reach out to Lora to book a customized hypnosis session so she can create one specifically for you, your healing, your confidence, and your recovery.

Then, reach out to Lora to book your own customized hypnosis session at www.AffairRecoveryForWomen.com

 

Top 3 Takeaways

  1. Confidence is not something you fake. It is something you become. Confidence is not about pretending to be someone else. It is about remembering the truest version of yourself and practicing that embodiment until your body begins to believe you again.
  2. Betrayal disrupts confidence because it disrupts self-trust. After infidelity or betrayal, it is common to question your intuition, worth, choices, and future. Healing requires more than information. It requires reconnecting with the part of you that knows you can rise again.
  3. Hypnosis can help create faster, deeper healing. Because hypnosis works with the subconscious mind, it can help release old fears, rewire limiting beliefs, and restore confidence at the level where many patterns actually live.

Favorite Quote

“Confidence is not something you find. It is something you become.”

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I'm Lora Cheadle

I’m Lora Cheadle, JD, CHt—a betrayal recovery expert, attorney, TEDx speaker, and author of FLAUNT! and It’s Not Burnout, It’s Betrayal. After uncovering my husband’s 15-year affair, I turned my own pain into purpose, helping high-achieving women reclaim their identity, power, and joy. As a trauma-aware coach and somatic therapist, I blend legal clarity with emotional and spiritual healing to guide women toward full-spectrum recovery.

Lora's Books

Flaunt! by Lora Cheadle
It’s Not Burnout, It’s Betrayal: 5 Tools to FUEL UP & Thrive

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Get the Transcript

  • Speaker A [00:00:01]: You’re listening to Flaunt. Find your sparkle and create a life you love after Infidelity or Betrayal. A podcast for women who’ve been betrayed by their intimate partner and want to turn their devastation into an invitation to reclaim themselves and their worth. Tune in weekly so you can start making sense of it all and learn how to be okay on the inside no matter what goes on on the outside. Download your free Betrayal Recovery toolkit@betrayalrecoveryguide.com. Lora Cheadle [00:00:35]: Confidence Confidence is not something that you find, it’s something that you become Today. Not only are we going to take a deep dive into confidence, but I’m also going to lead you through a full length hypnosis on becoming more confident. Why? Well, several different reasons. First, because it’s vitally important that we all feel confident. Healing really requires a certain level of confidence and I want as many people to have that as possible. When you work with me, one on one, one of the things that you get is customized individualized hypnosis files. And although that is quite frankly the best way to go because I’m speaking directly to you and we are address addressing your issues, personally I think this is a really close second and it’s my true, my true heart’s desire that as many of us thrive and flourish after infidelity as possible. Because betrayal is such a life altering event and it can be such a powerful catalyst for growth and I feel like this is my part in helping everybody reach their fullest potential. Lora Cheadle [00:02:00]: Now before we go into the show and the hypnosis and don’t worry, I’ll give you plenty of time to get prepared for the hypnosis. I’m going to share with you that I am super excited right now. My son is about to be married and you know what? I feel nothing but excitement and love and joy. But because of the busyness of the wedding, I’m going to be taking a few weeks off. Now I’ve pre recorded shows. I’ve got all of the shows pre recorded so you’re not going to get any replays, but I’m just not going to be live with you for the next three or four weeks. And I wanted to leave this show with you before my vacation because it would give you the opportunity to see save this hypnosis and to do it several times and to create change within your own body. If you are currently one of my clients, if we’re already working together, I’m going to give you an MP3 with the music just of this hypnosis file. Lora Cheadle [00:03:08]: But for the rest of you, save the show, mark where it’s going, and just fast forward to get to the hypnosis part. All right, confidence. Let’s talk a little bit about that first. Confidence isn’t something that you fake. You know, sometimes people say fake it until you make it, and sometimes that can be really helpful. It can be helpful when it helps you reconnect to a part of you that has been suppressed or hidden for too long, but it is not helpful if you’re in complete fake it mode. If you have never been confident before, how do you fake being confidence? Because how do you fake a state of being that you have never had before? Confidence is also not something that we perform for other people. We don’t just show up and pretend to be confident because we want to make people think of us a certain way. Lora Cheadle [00:04:06]: Confidence is who we are for ourselves. It’s not something that we will get or we will earn once we are, you name it, thinner, richer, happier, more healed in a different relationship, more successful, more certain, more put together. It has nothing to do with your state of being. Confidence truly is that inner knowing. It is not based on the outside world. It’s based on who you are on the inside. Confidence is that deep sense that you know that you were always more than enough just exactly as you are, no matter what happens. You can be confident and rich or confident and poor. Lora Cheadle [00:05:00]: You can be confident as you’re thin and beautiful and healthy and. And you can be just as confident if you’re sick and out of shape and feel miserable. Because confidence is that internal state of being, and it doesn’t have anything to do with what’s going on on the outside. Now, that said, I want to also be completely realistic. Yes. When we’re looking good and feeling good, it’s so much easier to feel confident. Speaker C [00:05:32]: Right? Lora Cheadle [00:05:34]: It’s so much easier when things are going well. And I just want to name that because it’s true. But even though it’s easier, it doesn’t mean that that’s a requirement. I can show up looking pretty raw, feeling pretty messy, and still know that even though in that moment I’m struggling, I am still confident. Because I still know that who I am is more than enough. It’s that grounded embodiment that says I can be with myself through this. I can sit with my own discomfort. I can sit here even though I’m a hot mess, and I can be comfortable enough with myself to. Lora Cheadle [00:06:25]: To keep showing up. I can choose to speak even though I don’t exactly know what to Say I can choose to take action. I can choose to recover. I can choose to fail spectacularly because I’m comfortable enough to sit with myself, to sit with my own discomfort, and I can trust myself through it all. And on some level, I do think this is part of confidence too. It’s knowing that on some level I will rise again, I’m worthy of having a life that I love, and I will rise again. And I am okay messing up. And that’s what real confidence is. Lora Cheadle [00:07:14]: And so often when I talk to people, they talk about it in terms of confidence equals perfection. And it’s just the opposite, really, when we need confidence is not when our life is perfect, because then it’s easy. We need confidence when everything is falling apart and when we’re okay being in that dark night of the soul. So what I want to talk about is the concept of. Of practicing confidence, because I think there’s a lot of misunderstanding around that. We can pretend to be confident even when we don’t feel confident. And that’s a good thing. When, when. Lora Cheadle [00:08:05]: This is my modifier. When we are performing ourselves at our most confident, where it is not helpful, is when we’re pretending to be someone else. So if I am thinking about my cousin Sally, who is supremely confident, and I’m pretending to be her, but she is nothing like me, that makes me a good performer. And it actually takes me further away from myself because when I’m pretending to be somebody else, what I’m really saying to myself is, darn it, Lori, you’re just not good enough. So when you think about accessing, tapping into your confidence, think about yourself at your most confident place in time. Maybe you were a kid, maybe you have to go all the way back, but how were you and who were you? And again, notice, like, I can think about when I was really cute as a high schooler physically, but I wasn’t so confident because I wasn’t secure in myself. I can think about times when I wasn’t as cute physically, but I really knew myself well and I knew my place and. And I was more confident. Lora Cheadle [00:09:36]: So one of the things I’m going to be asking you to do in the hypnosis is going back to those places of times in time when you were confident and identifying when was it internal and when was it external and what did it feel like? And how can you go back to the embodiment of that energy? How can you go back to the embodiment of that energy? It’s not about going back to a size 8 it’s not about going back to a higher paycheck. It’s not about going back to a relationship. It’s about going to that moment in time where you knew you were fine no matter what, where you absolutely without question knew that you would be fine no matter what. And then we’re going to practice returning to that moment. Now, for those of you who haven’t experienced hypnosis and who might be a little bit freaked out by it, don’t worry. It’s actually just a different name for a brainwave state. And it’s a normal natural brainwave state that, that all humans move in and out of throughout the day. On average, we go into a state of hypnosis about seven times a day anyway. Lora Cheadle [00:11:04]: So it’s a state of mind that you’ve already experienced. It’s something that you’re already familiar with. It feels just kind of like, well, one of two things. It can kind of feel like a state of flow where all of this stuff is going on around you and you’re aware that it’s happening, but you’re not tuned in or distracted or fixated by it. Kind of like if you are in a coffee shop and you’re reading or studying, there’s noise, there’s people, there’s doors opening, there’s people dropping things. But you’re not hyper fixated or focused on the noise. It’s just truly background noise. That is a state of hypnosis. Lora Cheadle [00:11:46]: Another time that people go into state of hypno state of hypnosis is anytime they are listening to television or radio ads. Commercials and ads are designed to overload our conscious mind and send us into a state of hypnosis. Have you ever noticed on the radio, on tv, whatever, ads are louder and they talk a lot faster. Just for 999 and you get this and qualifications make a lot and just all this, this flood of words and you get words, warranty, good qualifications. 999 act now fast. It’s this flurry of words that are faster and louder and that is designed intentionally to kick you into hypnosis. So you bypass conscious thought and you move into that state of oh, I better buy this. Oh, I better call now, I better act fast. Lora Cheadle [00:12:43]: So you’ve been in hypnosis, you’ve been in hypnosis since the day you were born. In and out. It’s not a scary state. I cannot manipulate or control you. What hypnosis does is it helps you have access to your full brain. We’ve got the left hemisphere, the Right hemisphere, the prefrontal cortex, the survival portion of the brain. We’ve got all of these different brain parts, and part of those brain parts are the conscious portion of the mind. The conscious portion of the mind, believe it or not, is only between 1 and 11% of the brain’s power. Lora Cheadle [00:13:24]: That’s that part where we’re critically aware, where we’re hyper focused, where we’re right there noticing absolutely everything at every point in time. The subconscious mind is, is everything else. And that is 11 to 99% of the brain. You know when they say we don’t use so much of our brain, we don’t use it, that’s that subconscious part. The survival portion of our brain is subconscious. It’s the part where it inspires us to run when we see a snake, and then we go, oh, why did I run? Or it inspires us to scream when we see a mouse or a spider and we think, why did I do that? That’s the subconscious portion of your brain. The subconscious mind records everything that has ever happened to you. It’s a complete perfect picture of all of the things that have ever happened to you. Lora Cheadle [00:14:23]: It’s the storehouse of experience, emotion, feeling. It’s a record of all the scary things that have happened, all the amazing things that have happened. And everything that has been unhealed and not processed also is stored in the subconscious. Now, between the conscious portion of the mind and the subconscious, there is a filter. At night, when you sleep, when you dream, that filter opens up and you have complete access to the conscious portion of your mind and the subconscious. Now, I’m going to drop in a note. It can be subconscious or unconscious, same difference. So sometimes I flip those terms and if you hear them both, know that I’m using them interchangeably. Lora Cheadle [00:15:09]: Subconscious, unconscious, it’s all the same thing. So back to dreaming. At night, when you’re asleep, when you’re dreaming, that filter between the conscious portion of the mind and the unconscious portion of your mind opens up. That’s why when you have dreams, there are these bizarre mixtures of fantasy and reality. Real things happen, but in fantastical ways, because that filter is not there anymore. So your mind can’t sort fiction, fantasy from reality. And if you think about it, all of our fears that are stored in the subconscious, they don’t know the difference between fantasy and reality either. And it’s those subconscious fears that so often drive the show. Lora Cheadle [00:15:58]: It is our great grandmother’s fear that it is our mom’s fear, that it’s society’s fear. That you are too old to find love, or you are too uneducated to be successful, or it’s too late because you’re past a certain age. All of those fears, all of those messages are stored. They’re logged in the subconscious and they are creating all of those limiting beliefs. So every time you choose from the conscious portion of your mind to move forward, I choose this. I’m going to do that. I’m going to. And I’m just making it up. Lora Cheadle [00:16:40]: I’m going to leave my partner, I’m going to get myself an incredible condo. I’m going to go back to school and get this certificate and then I’m going to get this incredible job and I’m going to. And you make all of these plans and you’re all set. And then you’re like, yes, ready to execute. And then these voices pop up. Who do you think you are? You’re too old for that. Nobody’s ever going to love you. This is probably the best thing you got going. Lora Cheadle [00:17:06]: You’re not going to make it work. You’re going to be poor forever. Those voices, those are those subconscious memories, so to speak, reflections, imprints of other people’s fears. They’re not your own fears, they’re somebody else’s. So when we use hypnosis, when I take you into a state of hypnosis, a few different things happen. First of all, you feel really good because you’re working with your whole brain, not just that tiny little conscious portion of your brain. Second of all, we’re able to access and isolate and release and remove some of those fears. We’re able to question them. Lora Cheadle [00:17:58]: We’re also able to input our own conscious ideas into the subconscious mind. So we start running on our whole brain and we’re no longer limiting ourselves. Now, I said earlier, I’m not controlling you. This is not a control mechanism. And here’s why I am asking you to isolate. What are your limiting voices? Mine are completely different. Yours are yours that I’m asking you to drop in your own most positive, most powerful, highest level desires. I’m not telling you my desires. Lora Cheadle [00:18:37]: My desires don’t matter. I. I’m asking you to put in Speaker C [00:18:41]: what matters for you. Lora Cheadle [00:18:44]: That’s why the customized hypnosis that I do when I work one on one with my clients is so powerful because we talk about it. You have a conversation with me and I coach you through pulling up those limiting blocks. I coach you through finding out how you want to feel and be and show up. And then I use your specific words. So the suggestions that I give you are geared and customized to you. So for purpose of today, I’m going to be some asking you some general things. Generally we’re going to be do this and it’s going to be very helpful and it’s going to change things enough that you will notice. But I also want you to know that it’s the customization. Lora Cheadle [00:19:37]: That’s where the, the magic, the pure absolute magic and the most rapid changes occur. So yes, if you want to see me for customized coaching and hypnosis, absolutely, reach out. But I also want you to start here. I want you to start with this. You can use this before you fall asleep at night. It’s also a really great tool. If you’re having a hard time falling asleep, you can use it in the morning when you first wake up. If you’re like a slow waker upper, you can use it in the middle of the day if you need a break. Lora Cheadle [00:20:15]: If it’s an afternoon slump and you’re like, ugh, I just need to lay down for a bit. You really can’t overuse this. And yes, you can share it with other people too. It’s great for kids. If you’re still with your partner, you can use it with them. There’s nothing, there’s nothing bad that can happen with hypnosis. It feels good and it’s a very fast way to make some change. And also I want to say, if you’ve got questions, please reach out and let me know. Lora Cheadle [00:20:47]: I love it when you email me, Lora cheadle.com unless, ask your questions. Let me know what’s shifting for you. And then if you want to work together. A fair recovery for women dot com. A fair recovery for women. Or again, if you just email me and say, hey Lora, I want to do a hypnosis, I’ll be like, okay, here’s the link for the payment in the schedule. Bam. It is that easy. Lora Cheadle [00:21:12]: Now reminder though, I am leaving town until the middle of July. So we will not be able to do your customized session until after July. But you know what? That is why I’m doing this. So you can get yourself prepped, get yourself practiced. Because like anything else, hypnosis is a skill. And learning to go into hypnosis is a skill. Just like learning how to meditate, just like learning how to do breath work, just like learning how to do anything. It’s a skill. Lora Cheadle [00:21:50]: And the more you practice, the better you become and the more effective the hypnosis becomes. So with that said, use this file Use this file. Use this file. Use this file. Reach out to me, Lora cheadle.com or affairrecoveryforwomen.com and book your own session so we can build off what we’re doing today and so you can launch forward much more quickly, much more effectively and be healed. And I do want to say it is about being healed. It is about feeling good. I know how desperate I was to feel better, how desperate I was to be able to sleep through the stinking night. Lora Cheadle [00:22:42]: How desperate I was to be able to get through a day without being overcome with tears or obsessive thoughts. How much I just wanted my old life back. And truly, hypnosis is the fastest way to get your life back. No downside here. It is the fastest way to get your life back. Anyway, are you ready? Are you as excited as I. As I am? Okay, here are my caveats. Before we begin, please do not listen to this as you are driving or operating heavy machinery, okay? Because although you will be aware of things that are going on around you, you will not be focused on the things that are going on around you. Lora Cheadle [00:23:29]: So if you need to maintain full awakened consciousness, you’ll need to pause this and do it later, okay? But before you pause, let me tell Speaker C [00:23:37]: you a few things. Lora Cheadle [00:23:38]: Here’s the best way to experience hypnosis in some sort of a distraction free environment. Make sure your cell phone is turned off. Turn off your email program so you’re not getting all those little bings in the moment. Go into your bedroom, go into your office, sit in your car, wherever it is, wherever you can be comfortable. It’s not that it has to be completely quiet around you. It doesn’t. And in fact, a lot of the noises around you when will only make you go deeper and deeper into a state of hypnosis. But just make sure that you’re in a space where you’re able to complete the experience and relax and enjoy. Lora Cheadle [00:24:21]: Some people, many people love journaling afterwards. So if you want to get some water handy, if you want to get a paper and pen, something like that, and spend some time journaling, that’s perfect. I prefer to have my environment a little bit dim. I just close the blinds when it’s the middle of the day. It’s not a big deal. Sometimes I light a candle because it’s just nice to have the ambiance. So do what you want to create an ambiance and an environment that is pleasing to you. But again, it’s what is pleasing to you, not what is pleasing to me. Lora Cheadle [00:25:02]: And then also know this, during the hypnosis, you are never incapacitated. You are never unable to do something. If you were at home and you did light a candle and your candle tips over and it catches something on fire, God forbid you’ll be able to wake up, stand up, put out the fire. If your child runs in and they need something, you’re able to address that. It’s not like you are zoned out Speaker C [00:25:33]: or in a coma. Lora Cheadle [00:25:34]: You are always safe. You were always able to open your eyes and stand up. If there is ever anything that I’m saying that doesn’t make you feel comfortable, for some reason your conscious mind clicks in and it’s like not doing that. So I just want to completely assure you this is not woo woo. It’s actually very clinical. It’s very scientific. I am a clinical hypnotherapist. I spent two years training for hypnotherapy. Lora Cheadle [00:26:07]: It’s not like I did a little weekend course and now I’m going to whip this out on you. No. I spent two years from the only national, national accredited hypnotherapy school in the United States. So I do know what I’m doing. I will keep this very safe. It will be incredibly effective for you and it will create the change that you desire. All right, Are you ready? Okay, now is the time, if you’re driving, to pause. Come back whenever you can. Speaker A [00:26:45]: Ah. Speaker C [00:26:48]: Go ahead and find yourself in a comfortable position, whether you’re seated or lying. Take whatever time you need to get comfortable, to adjust and readjust, to breathe and to just soften. Because for the next almost 30 minutes, you will be very present in your body, in your mind, in your own experience. Move your attention towards your breath Lora Cheadle [00:27:40]: and Speaker C [00:27:40]: just feel the inhalation, the exhalation, the rise, the fall of the chest. And at some point, you will feel the urge to swallow. Maybe it’s already happened, maybe you have already swallowed. But just notice that too. Not changing, not holding your breath, just noticing the in, the out, the rise and the fall. And how with every breath, you become more and more relaxed, more and more present in your body. Feeling the skin on the palms, the space between the fingers, the pads of the fingers. It’s almost like you can sense or feel your fingerprints on every finger. Speaker C [00:29:10]: Keep breathing, relaxing and just letting go. And as you were here in this moment, move your attention down to your feet. Feel your feet. Are they soft or heavy? How are they resting? Relax. Across the ball of the foot, the arch, the heel and up the Achilles tendon. Relax every toe. And feel like your whole foot is getting softer and softer with every passing second. Breathe and move that relaxation up the shin with every in breath, pull that deep relaxation up the shin, up the calf, up the back of the knee, the inside of the knee, the outside of the knee and the kneecap. Speaker C [00:31:03]: Softening, breathing and just letting go. With your next in breath, once again, pull that relaxation up the inner thigh, up, up, spreading it around to the quad, to the top of that thigh, all the way up into the hip flexors, to the outer thigh, to the hamstring. Do you feel your legs resting? What parts of your legs are touching a surface? What parts of your legs aren’t touching anything at all? Can you sense your legs in space, softening, relaxing, and always going deeper? Breathe, and this time, direct that breath into the low belly. And as the breath hits that low belly, it relaxes and releases the relaxation from the legs moving up, up into the hips, into the glutes, into the gut. And the relaxation from drawing that breath down, down, deeper and deeper into the belly, relaxing your organs, the sk. The muscles. And as you relax in that gut, you feel emotions that you have been carrying, emotions that you have been storing, emotions that have been stuffed down, sometimes for years, begin to gently float up and out, up and out through that abdomen. With every exhalation, Those emotions travel out, away, out, and blow them away. Speaker C [00:34:24]: Whether they leave through the breath or through the soft, supple skin of the abdomen. You notice those emotions releasing and just letting go. Moving your attention to the very tip of the tailbone, start relaxing up the spine, one vertebrae at a time, all the way through that lumbar spine to the thoracic spine, which is the part of the spine right behind your heart. Feel the relaxation and the opening of the back, all the way up the neck and right at the very top where that spine hits the head, the input right there where the spine and the head meet and relax the entire spine. And as you do, you feel those ribs soften. The breath soften, The diaphragm, stomach, liver, all soften. And on your back, right above those hips, your kidneys soften, releasing the fear from those kidneys, from that back. Under that left rib, releasing resentment under the right rib, releasing anger and rage. Speaker C [00:36:57]: Just letting those emotions flow out of your body, through the skin, through the breath, in whatever way works best for you. And just relax. Relax and let go. Feel the heart steadily beating within your chest, pumping that blood steadily through your body. In your mind’s eye, you can hear that heartbeat you can sense the movement of that blood, and you know that as shattered energetically as your heart feels, it is strong physically, it is intact, it is healthy, it is pumping, and it is profoundly alive. Relax the skin on the chest, the collarbones, the shoulders, the arms, elbows, forearms, wrists and hands. Feel the energy, the waves of your beating heart pulse through the shoulders, down the arms, into the hands and out the fingers. With every heartbeat, pulse your own beautiful, powerful life force through those arms as you go deeper and deeper into a state of hypnosis, and deeper and deeper into a state of relaxation. Speaker C [00:39:30]: Relax your neck, your throat, your jaw, your cheekbones, nose and eyebrows. Allow the eyes to soften, melt, and move down, down, softening the ears, the scalp and the entire brain. You’re aware of sounds around, But they just don’t rock you. They only take you deeper and deeper into a state of relaxation, and deeper and deeper into a state of hypnosis. Feel that body, feel that presence. Be aware of your mind, knowing that at any time, of course, you could open the eyes and move into the rest of your day or night, but not wanting to, just wanting to stay here, listening to my voice and going deeper and deeper into a state of relaxation, and deeper and deeper into a state of hypnosis. I want you to imagine, visualize, or pretend now that you see in front of you an escalator that is going down, just down one level. And all you have to do is step on that escalator and it carries you down, down to a level of relaxation that is deeper than you were before, where the brain is more open, the conscious and the subconscious connected. Speaker C [00:42:03]: You are back in touch with yourself at this lower level, back in touch with levels of innate confidence, wisdom and worthiness. If you haven’t done so already, step on this escalator and allow it to carry you down deeper and deeper to a deeper level of relaxation, a deeper level of awareness, a deeper level of presence. And whenever you hit that next floor, step off the escalator and just go down deeper and deeper. Looking around, you see one more escalator carrying you down yet another level. Take a few breaths and keeping your eyes closed, sweep your eyes beneath the lids, left to right, right to left, back and forth, slowly, just sweeping. And as you keep those eyes sweeping back and forth, back and forth, step once again onto the escalator and let it carry you down deeper and deeper to an even lower, deeper, more peaceful level of relaxation. Keep those eyes sweeping left and right as you go down, down, down. And each and every time you hear my Voice say, deeper and deeper. Speaker C [00:43:59]: You will go more quickly, more easily, into a state of hypnosis. The mind will open in the physical body will relax, gliding off that escalator. Now, I want you to return in your mind’s eye Lora Cheadle [00:44:24]: to a point in Speaker C [00:44:25]: time where you felt confident, you felt secure, you felt so happy, you felt like you could take on the world. You knew that no matter what happened, only good things would happen for you. And if you can’t remember a place, a point where you felt like this, that’s okay. To create it in the future. Returning to the past, creating the future, that perfect bridge back to a time when. And forward to a time when. Feel that sense of confidence, of assured reliance. Lora Cheadle [00:45:33]: If enthusiasm, whatever it is, Speaker C [00:45:38]: let it fill you up. Lora Cheadle [00:45:42]: How does it feel? Speaker C [00:45:44]: What changes in your body when you feel confident? When you feel worthy? Is your throat more open? The crown of your head lifted more strongly to the sky? Is your breath deeper? Notice what feels different in the way that you look around, in the way that you carry yourself. Lora Cheadle [00:46:20]: Now. Speaker C [00:46:21]: Notice both in the past and in Lora Cheadle [00:46:24]: the future, what’s happening on the outside? What’s happening on the outside? How do you look? Speaker C [00:46:40]: How are other people acting or reacting? Where are you? What season is it? What are you wearing? Can you hear the sound of your own feet? Lora Cheadle [00:47:08]: What song is playing? Speaker C [00:47:10]: What do you hear? Are you eating or drinking anything? Lora Cheadle [00:47:20]: Notice everything that you can about what’s going on on the outside. Speaker C [00:47:29]: And as you notice, you will notice that your attention begins to shift to one or two key items. Lora Cheadle [00:47:43]: Your attention shifts to one or two Speaker C [00:47:46]: key items that serve as your anchor to this feeling of confidence. Maybe it’s a pair of red shoes. Lora Cheadle [00:48:01]: Maybe it’s a certain color of lipstick. Speaker C [00:48:06]: Maybe it’s a certain flavor or sunlight. Lora Cheadle [00:48:14]: Notice one or two things that are Speaker C [00:48:17]: your key anchors to feeling confident. Maybe it’s a song. Select that anchor now, knowing that in Lora Cheadle [00:48:33]: the future, going forward, whenever you need Speaker C [00:48:37]: to reconnect to this confidence, whenever you Lora Cheadle [00:48:40]: need to fully embody how it feels Speaker C [00:48:43]: to be confident, this anchor can help you get there from this point forward. That song, that color, that visual, that moment will help you connect to this embodied feeling of confidence. Then go within, to the best of your ability. Can you describe how you feel within? Do you feel bigger than yourself? Do you feel accepted? Lora Cheadle [00:49:34]: Do you feel powerful? What’s going on inside? Speaker C [00:49:38]: How is your breath? How is your posture? How is your mind? Are you clear at a different level? Are you expanded. Just like you did in noticing what was going on around you? Notice how you feel Inside. When you feel confident, Lora Cheadle [00:50:15]: open, Speaker C [00:50:18]: capable, Lora Cheadle [00:50:22]: come Speaker C [00:50:22]: up with your word, knowing that your Lora Cheadle [00:50:26]: word doesn’t even have to make sense. Speaker C [00:50:28]: Your word can be blue, it doesn’t matter. You have that internal anchor, that internal Lora Cheadle [00:50:37]: word, that internal reminder of how this feels. And you have your external anchor, your Speaker C [00:50:43]: external reminder of how to get back here and now. Allow that subconscious mind to start bubbling up. Lora Cheadle [00:50:56]: Allow all of your past unhealed wounds, Speaker C [00:51:00]: experiences, traumas, beliefs to start percolating and bubbling up. And out of that subconscious mind, beliefs Lora Cheadle [00:51:09]: that you thought were yours, beliefs that you thought were about the way work, Speaker C [00:51:14]: let them float up, let them float out. They are not yours. What is holding you back? Lora Cheadle [00:51:26]: Allow that thing, that very next thing Speaker C [00:51:30]: that is holding you back. Fear, pain, wounding, insecurity, lack of confidence, whatever it is, let that thing, thing starts shaking loose. Where did it come from? Lora Cheadle [00:51:47]: What does it mean? Speaker C [00:51:52]: And just let it loosen, float up through that subconscious mind like bubbles at the very bottom of a deep ocean, come up and pop at the surface to be let go. And then choose that internal anchor, that internal word. Choose that external anchor, that external thing, and drop them into that subconscious mind, taking the place of those blocks, those beliefs that no longer serve you. Release what needs to come out. Release what’s holding you back. Release what hurts. Replace it with that feeling of confidence, that word, that external anchor, knowing that from this point forward, you are confident. You embody confidence. Speaker C [00:53:11]: You are comfortable with yourself in all forms. Take a deep breath and silently repeat to yourself, I am enough. I am worthy. I am comfortable with myself. I will rise again and again. I take care of myself. I spend whatever time and resources I need to take care of myself. Because I know I am worthy. Speaker C [00:54:03]: I know I deserve it. I deserve to feel good. I feel confident. I am confident. Being confident does not mean I’m perfect. Lora Cheadle [00:54:28]: Being confident does not mean I sometimes Speaker C [00:54:31]: don’t feel afraid or insecure. But I am confident because I am comfortable with myself. And I’ve got this. Take a few moments to breathe, to let your mind float and relax. And if you choose to stay in this space, you may stay in this space, opening your eyes whenever you are ready, or just rolling over and falling into a deep, relaxing sleep. But when you wake up, whether it’s after a full night’s rest or after a few moments, whenever you open your eyes, you will take a full, deep breath that will bring you out, out of the hypnosis and back into a state of full awakened consciousness. You will feel rested, you will feel peaceful, and you will remember that above all else you are confident you are worthy, and you will always remember to flaunt exactly who you are, because who you are is always more than enough. Speaker A [00:56:05]: You. Tune in next time to flaunt, find your sparkle and create a life you love. After Infidelity or Betrayal with Lora Cheadle every Wednesday at 7am and 7pm Eastern Standard Time on syndicated Dream Vision 7 radio network. Uncover the truth of what’s possible for you on the other side of betrayal, and develop the skills and strategies necessary to embrace the future and flourish today. Download your free Betrayal Recovery toolkit@betrayalrecoveryguide.com.