Last weekend, my mom, my daughter-in-law-to-be, and I took on an escape room together in celebration of my birthday. If you’ve never done one before, it’s an immersive game where you’re “locked” in a room and have to solve puzzles, uncover hidden clues, and crack codes to complete a challenge before time runs out.
I wasn’t sure how we’d do—after all, we’re three generations, with three very different ways of thinking. But you know what? We crushed it!
And as we navigated the room, frantically trying keys in locks, flipping objects over to reveal secret compartments, and calling out clues, I realized how much this experience mirrored the journey of affair recovery.
So many of the lessons we learned in that escape room are the same ones that will help you move forward after betrayal. Let’s break them down.
-
Sometimes You Don’t Know Why Someone Is Doing Something, But It Works. Trust the Process!
At one point, my daughter-in-law started messing with a random knob. It looked like nothing important to me, it looked like we needed three more knobs, actually, but she kept at it. A few moments later—click!—she figured out that the single knob was the key to a direction padlock, revealing a crucial clue.
In betrayal recovery, there are times when things don’t seem to make sense. Maybe you’re journaling, meditating, or doing deep breathing exercises, and you wonder, How is this going to help me heal? But then, one day, something shifts. You realize you’re feeling lighter. A piece of the puzzle clicks into place.
You don’t always have to understand why something works. Just trust that if you keep showing up for yourself, the answers will come.
-
Different Perspectives and Life Experiences Are Invaluable.
I would have gotten stuck on some puzzles without my daughter-in-law’s fresh perspective. And my mom? She saw things I never would have. Alone, each of us would have struggled. But together? We thrived.
Healing after betrayal isn’t something you have to do alone. In fact, trying to do it in isolation often keeps you stuck. That’s why support is so important—whether it’s a coach, a friend, a therapist, or a community of women who have walked this path before you. Sometimes, you need someone outside of yourself to show you the way forward.
-
No Matter What, Keep Moving!
This escape room had so many locks—padlocks, combination locks, even hidden locks disguised as furniture pieces. Sometimes, we had the right key but the wrong lock. Other times, we thought we had the correct combination, but nothing clicked.
Did we stop? No. We just tried something else.
Betrayal recovery is the same way. You might try therapy, but it doesn’t feel quite right. You might read books, but the insights don’t fully land. You might meditate but feel restless instead of peaceful. That doesn’t mean you’re failing. It just means you need to try another key.
The worst thing you can do is get stuck and stop moving. If something doesn’t work, pivot. Try a different approach. Keep moving forward.
-
Have Fun & Celebrate Your Accomplishments!
When we solved the final puzzle and the door popped open, we cheered like crazy! And we should have—escaping a room full of mind-bending puzzles is a big deal!
Healing is full of tiny victories too. Maybe you went a whole day without obsessing over the past. Maybe you caught yourself before spiraling into self-doubt. Maybe you danced in your living room for no reason other than that it felt good.
Celebrate those moments! They are proof that you’re healing, even when it doesn’t feel like it.
Your Escape is Inevitable—You Just Need to Keep Going
Here’s the truth: You are not trapped. The key to your healing is in your hands.
Just like an escape room, you don’t have to know all the answers right away. You just have to be willing to take the next step. And if you need a guide, a team, or a map, I’ve got you.
If you’re ready to move forward, my Rise & Reign program is here to support you. Click here to learn more and take your next step: https://loracheadle.com/rise-and-reign/
The door is waiting to be unlocked. You’ve got this.
With love and liberation,
Lora
